Bad Sportsmanship
by KoopaKonnect
Summary: When Bowser abducts Peach in the middle of the widely publicized Special Cup racing series, the hunt is on to get the princess back. Little does the Koopa King know he's not the only villain scheming this time around. PeachxBowser. With others.
1. More Than A Flat Tire

**A/N:** This is my first Mario-related story, so bear with me! I'm no expert, and I'm nervous that I might not stand up to the scrutiny of all you Mario fans out there. I'd like to extend my gratitude to **superblooper **whose one-shots are on my Favorites list (and whose oneshot 'Ends' served as an initial inspiration for me!). This story may eventually be moved up to an 'M' rating, but for now - no worries! Please, no flaming...but comments are more than welcome!

I own nothing - from the characters to the track - it all belongs to Nintendo!

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><p>The Special Cup was among the most anticipated series in the world – for any avid racing fan from Mushroom Kingdom to Diamond City to Donkey Kong Island to the Dark Lands (and more! Who wouldn't tune it to support their kingdom's representatives?). Racers competed throughout the year to qualify for the most dangerous and difficult quartet of tracks, but in the end only twelve were chosen. Both individual and team races were held – from the former, three advanced to the awards ceremony held outside of Mushroom Castle, from the latter, six. Oh, it was lovely. All of the spectators gathered in Toad Town, lining the streets to cheer the winners up to the podium where trophies were given, photographs taken. The festivities lasted well into the night with a sumptuous banquet, live music, and a precarious peace maintained by all. The Special Cup Series was a far more…successful diplomatic summit than anything Peach could've accomplished in a stuffy conference hall – instead of political jargon and long-winded ceremony, mega mushrooms and stars, instead of carefully veiled threats and tedious bartering, triple red shells and bob-ombs. Her only wish was that the sportsmanship <em>lasted<em>.

While Peach – unlike Daisy, whose whooping and hollering could be heard over the rumble of a dozen engines – never completely indulged in the competitive spirit, ever mindful of diplomatic courtesy while behind the wheel, she loved to race. And this year, her team had a real shot of winning the gold. While they'd competed as individuals in carts, bikes were a whole other matter and she couldn't have been more pleased overall: Team Blue was comprised of not only herself but Daisy, Mario, Toad, and Diddy Kong whom she found charming despite the language barrier. Waluigi had also been assigned to her team, much to her cousin's vocalized dismay, but even he respected ('respected'?) the sanctity of the sport. His crassness was…minimal, most of it directed towards the Red Team - which, consequently, included his brother, Wario, alongside King Boo, that delightful Yoshi, poor Luigi (who put on a brave face), a Koopa Troopa named Kooper (one of Bowser's unfortunate minions), and Bowser himself.

It was easy to ignore him.

"I'm gonna mop the floor with you idiots!" _Maybe 'easy' isn't the right word… _ "You got that, Super Stupid Brothers? I don't even _need _a team to stomp you!"

"Oh yeah?" Daisy shot back, twisting around on the Dolphin Dasher with a flip of auburn-brown hair to glare over Mario's head at the King Koopa himself. Mario, being the sort of man who wasn't easily ruffled, stared straight ahead. He didn't even give Bowser the time of day, and Peach gave him a sideways glance, a soft smile. He never let the ribald comments and dirty driving stunts bring out the worst in him. Sheer talent, that's what gave Mario the confidence not to…sink to their level.

But Daisy? She just couldn't let an insult stand. "Your 'not needing a _team_', turtle-boy, is why you're stuck in eighth!" It was true – the instant replay didn't lie, and Bowser got… sidetracked trying to bump Luigi, his _teammate_, into ongoing traffic repeatedly last race. The sabotage resulted in _her _team taking first, second, fourth through sixth, and tenth. They were twenty-one points ahead in the rankings, with just the first two courses. "You'll be eatin' our dust all the way to Toad Town – Blue Team's the best!"

"Daisy!" Peach hissed, cradling most of the bike weight against her left leg as she leaned towards her cousin, to better give them…the semblance of privacy? She could feel the warmth of the ground beneath the soles of her pink boots, and maybe a tremor – but that could've just been nerves. "Don't _antagonize _him." A little healthy competition never hurt anyone (well, not _seriously_), but there was no need to push it…especially with Bowser. In fact, Peach just preferred (when he wasn't kidnapping her) to pretend he didn't exist – this was one of the few downsides to racing season: Bowser _always _qualified.

"What?" Daisy's tone was all innocence, but it didn't last. She turned back to Peach with a half-shrug, "_You _heard what that scaly-"

"Yeah right!" he retorted, cutting in arrogantly, "Best at getting Bowserized!" The Koopa King wasn't known for his…verbal sparring, so he fumbled for a second before triumphantly booming- "And you drive like a girl!"

_Oh no_. Blue eyes flashed indignantly and Daisy turned around fully on her bike, flushing red with anger, gloved fists clenched. "And I _still _kicked your butt! By six seconds!"

"That last race doesn't even count!" he roared over her contempt, the Flame Runner shuddering beneath-  
>"Why? Because you were such a <em>loser<em>?"  
>"If your punkass boyfriend hadn't gotten in <em>my <em>way-"  
>"Don't you talk that way about him!"<br>"This is _my _race…_Tulip!_ My castle! You-"  
>"It's <em>Daisy<em>! Day-zee! Not-"  
>"-don't stand a chance!"<br>"-Tulip, you overgrown shellfish!"

"Yoshi Yoshi!" Peach, who'd been helplessly watching Daisy grow ever more infuriated, shouting over Bowser with an underlying growl to match his own, gave a startled glance to her other side – where the third-place contender drew her attention to the referee who'd cleared his throat twice, rearranged his glasses, and now glowered in her cousin's direction.

The Mushroom Princess intervened before anything more could be said with a raised voice, high with forced politeness, "Let's just settle this on the racetrack, shall we?" The question was coupled with an emphatic look to Daisy – who, noticing the Lakitu impatiently hovering above them, grudgingly resituated herself on her bike with a determined squeeze of the handlebars.

"Fine by me," she said tartly, with a sharp nod to the referee, "Let's _do_ this." The Lakitu dropped his right hand with the first light, again with the second light – after which Peach hit the gas in preparation for her turbo start – then the third. The lights flashed blue and her Mach Bike shot down the wooden bridge that hung dangerously low over the lava-filled moat of Bowser's Castle (one of many). She missed her first opportunity to show off a trick as she made the jump to the stone entrance, carved into a likeness of the Koopa's – mouth agape, eyes gleaming with an eerie yellow – he was so _narcissistic. _She squealed as she landed with a few sparks, leaning forward on her bike to urge it through the optical illusion of a _moving_, wavering stone hallway (decorated with nothing more than archaic torches and red carpet). Daisy rounded the corner before her, and Peach would've cheered her cousin on if she weren't so focused on staying on track. The twists and turns were to be expected, but the heat was so _stifling_. They were surrounded by lava on all sides and had Peach the luxury to gape as she drove her bike over the second jump, she would've. The track had been built across the middle of the molten lake, dimly lit arches blocked on either side (which undoubtedly led to the rest of the castle), complete with half pipes and thick, tire-melting splotches of lava to prevent any racer from a straight, easy shot across.

The hideous, much larger than life _mechanical _Bowser at the fork in this circuit waved his clawed hands, head and jaw snapping at quick intervals to deliver massive, sizzling fireballs rolling down the middle of their path. "Here I go!" she cried with a quick prayer, twisting her bike just so to clear the fireball as she took the right halfpipe – _and _landed safely on the stone, "Yay!" A wheelie across a raised platform helped her clear the rest of this treacherous segment of the race, and she shot off to the right, avoiding the blazing, fiery windmills as she cleared another jump, gasping as adrenaline coursed through her body from the tip of her ponytail down to her _toes_. This was so _dangerous! _

Even she had to admit that Bowser really did outdo himself – the most threatening things she could stand to permit in _her _races were Chain Chomps off their chains, and even then, only confined to the gardens. "Yeah!" Soon Peach was driving the bike with an uneven bounce up two sets of staircases, avoiding a trio of angry thwomps as she caught sight of Daisy's bike between two flaming, star-shaped geysers.

"I'm-a gonna win!" _Wario. _Peach heard his bike clear a geyser bump behind her – and dropped three banana peels, twisting around with an enthusiastic (okay, so she could be a _little _competitive), "All right!" when she heard him spin out of control with a curse. But he wasn't the only one on her tail – she saw a flash of green before she heard his voice over the roar of steam and magma, "Yo-yo-yoshi!"

Something hissed over head just as Peach crossed the finish line on the first lap – and she realized what it was too late, shrieking, "Daisy! Look out!"

"Huh?" The brunette craned her neck back, saw it too, eyes widening as winged blue (and spikes) dove towards her, "Aw, brutal!" The spiny shell struck her cousin in mid-air, the explosion knocking her into the lava – well, _almost_, the Lakitu's fishing pool hooked onto the spokes of her bike just in time. Peach had participated in several cups, several races, and she knew that none of the damage was permanent but…her heart still caught in her throat as Daisy fell. Although she didn't stop, Peach kept turning back, shooting furtive glances over her shoulder until the lava disappeared from view-

"Aah!" She nearly collided with the wall when she turned back, twisting the handlebars of her bike so hard that she smashed into the other side of the hallway before righting herself. _This is for you, Daisy_. Peach was ready for the jump this time – the one that would lead her to the hardest part of the track in the middle of that lava sea – and when she shot into the air, the princess swung her whole bike and body into a back flip with the momentum, landing with perfect form in the middle of the track. "Yes, Peach!" Sometimes a girl had to cheer herself on.

She thought she might really have a chance to win this for her team, but while she cleared the first ramp, _someone _inked her with a blooper and with a panicked scream, Peach lost control of the wheel and _sank _into the sticky, melted speed trap, the tires of her bike struggling to pull free. It had utterly _stopped _her – while three racers leapt over her head with their respective victory cries, among them, Mario. He knew better than the sacrifice the gold medal just because she was stuck in a little bit of…what _was _this exactly?

"Peach!" The sound of her name surprised her – just in time to see the fireball rumbling straight towards-

"Oh no!" She screamed, to no avail. Her back tire was still stuck and Peach just- all she could do was brace herself for- for _arms _that wrapped around her waist suddenly and _yanked _her clear off her seat and to the side. Her bike wasn't so lucky – it collided with the molten rock and lost, smashed clear off the track and into the lava below. "My bike!"

That was her first bewildered reaction as she saw glimpses of her perfectly polished vehicle sinking with finality into the-

"Your _bike_?" Scoffing was palpable in the growl, "Princess, that coulda been you getting creamed – you know, if it wasn't for me!" She would've recognized that baritone anywhere...and if that wasn't enough, all she had to do was look down to see yellowed, scaly forearms - each at least three times the size of her own - spiked wristbands, and thick, claw-tipped fingers digging into the midriff of her ink-splattered suit.

"Bowser!" She pushed at his hands with pink gloves (stained with a few stray specks of black), twisting out of his grasp and spinning around to confirm it for herself. Sure enough, she found herself face-to-face - well, face to...chest with the Koopa King. He stared down at her over his great, toothy snout with what had to be one of the most...self-satisfied expressions she'd ever... "What are you _doing_?"

The would-be smile disappeared into a more familiar scowl - and he squinted at her. "I just saved you!" he said irritably, as if was the obvious conclusion, "Did it a lot better than the Idiot Brothers too, huh? They're long gone!" They weren't the only ones. The race hadn't stalled - even if Peach had - and now she and Bowser were all but alone in the middle of the track.

Oooh, stars! She'd let her whole team down if she came in _twelfth_. She wouldn't earn them any points at all. "I didn't need to be _saved_, it's just a game!" Peach protested in a huff, recovering enough to be annoyed - and embarrassed as she wiped at the black smeared all over her face. It was even in her _hair_, if she crossed her eyes she could see the dark strands that had slipped free of bobby pins. It didn't put her in a particularly charitable mood - who did he think he was? "_You _shouldn't even be off your bike - it's against the rules, Bowser!"

His expression (she'd gotten better at reading them, having been taken hostage so many times), somewhere between confused and bored at her chastising sharpened at the mention of- "_I'm _a King, I _make _the rules!" He was never wrong, and he could do whatever he wanted - especially in his own castle! "And if it weren't for me, you'd be in big trouble, Princess." He sounded surly, aggravated that she wasn't as grateful as he expected, "You see anybody else around here?"

As a matter of fact-

Peach hesitated. The referee was nowhere to be found - usually he would've been here by now, and he would've pulled her out of the lava instantly. But seconds passed and there was... there was no one. That was strange.

"C'mon," Bowser cajoled gruffly, "Don't I deserve a little credit? I jumped off my bike as soon as I saw you, this is a _custom _job, Peach." He stepped back to reveal the Flame Runner, still running but carelessly tossed on its side. She tilted her head past the Koopa's girth and she _could _see the silver gleam of...a few long scratches through the paint of the...mouth and...well, knowing how competitive he was, it did seem...it was...

"I...I..." This wasn't coming easy at all. "Very well." She recovered her royal composure, despite her appearance, straightened her back and looked him in the eye when she said it. "Thank you, Bowser." Civility.

He snorted once, in what she supposed was...satisfaction? "That's better." Peach frowned, but the Koopa King ignored her, "Let's go. I got a race to win." He turned his back on her to pick up his bike which...despite its size...still seemed dwarfed by its rider. He righted the motorcycle, got on it and...looked at her. Expectantly.

Oh, he couldn't be serious. "I'll just...wait here for...a replacement bike," she stated primly, shifting from one foot to the other with as much dignity as she could muster.

Bowser's shoulders slumped and his gaze bored into her, unsurprised and unimpressed. "Don't be stupid." Hmph. "You'll get run over by one of those idiot plumbers, or that ape." They were certainly on the third lap by now - so much time had been wasted, how could she even hope to catch up? "I'll drop you off at the finish line."

Well. Bowser was right about _one _thing - she really didn't like having to admit that to herself - this was the...worst place for her to be stranded.

"I…suppose," Peach replied slowly, her instinctive resolve never to acquiesce to _any _of Bowser's 'suggestions' faltering. The lava sweltered and bubbled beneath them, heat radiating up from the lake through the track. She'd already broken out into a sweat beneath the spandex suit and with no Lakitu in sight, she didn't have a way to reach the finish line by foot. Bowser impatiently revved the Flame Runner and the Mushroom Princess pursed her lips briefly. _He's never tried anything during the games before_, she thought, in an effort to justify herself. She was terribly uncomfortable and...and no matter what Bowser – or for that matter, Waluigi or Wario – schemed, everyone seemed to be able to put their differences aside to compete. In fact, this was probably the safest she'd ever been...with him...in his castle...

Mario and Luigi were already here! And Daisy...and, well, Toad who wasn't a fighter, exactly, but he...he would never let anything happen to her. The entire event was recorded and...and there was no way that Bowser could get away with- with whatever he might...oh stars, she felt like her feet were _melting_.

"You want me to leave you or not, Princess?"

"No, no, I'm...I'm coming!" she darted across the stone on her tiptoes (in between bowling-style fireballs) and...and only furrowed her brow when Bowser extended a claw to her. She wanted to refuse on principle - he called her _stupid_, after all - but that would be silly and...well, she'd need his...assistance. So she took the offered hand and gasped in surprise when the Koopa lifted her up easily and plopped her down - unceremoniously - between his legs on the bike seat. Apparently he had scooted back, enough for her to fit - this bike was so big, he was just...she felt a little queasy, surrounded on all sides by...well, him.

"Hold on." His voice was rough, difficult to hear over the sound of the motor, and Peach barely had time to grip the chrome red 'mane' of the bike before Bowser cleared the speed trap she'd been stuck on with ease, revving down the opposite fork she'd taken.

Despite all her self-assurances, something felt very...wrong about this.  
>She hoped she hadn't made a mistake.<p> 


	2. A Wrench in the Rescue

**A/N:** I definitely didn't expect to get any reviews on my first chapter - so thanks so much to **a.m.** and **StoryMaster64**! You really upped my confidence for continuing with this story, I appreciate it so much! This chapter's a little shorter than the last...but its purpose is to finish up setting the scene/background.

As per the last chapter, I don't own the characters - thanks, Nintendo!  
>And thanks to everyone who reads! It means a lot to me, really. You're awesome - regardless of whether or not you review!<p>

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><p>Destroying a twenty year tradition of peaceful, respectful competition among international racing enthusiasts was all in a day's work for a burly king of evil like himself – but to do it with Peach in his lap? Oh yeah, Bowser was smug. Alright, she wasn't <em>technically <em>in his lap but she was…in front of him, sharing his seat, and she'd smudged the head of his bike with her ink-stained gloveprints – proof that she'd been there, much to his satisfaction – and when he braked hard, she rocked back against him (even if only for a second). She'd never been this close to him…er…willingly before. He really wanted to drive past Mario, slow down to let the guy get a good look - him and Peach on _his _bike, just to rub it in that mustached moron's face.

Peach, of course, was nowhere near as pleased. She'd scooted as far forward on the seat as she could safely manage, even arching her back so as to minimize the amount of physical contact she had with Bowser. The staircases were particularly nightmarish, since she was knocked back into him every time she pulled forward – and she hunched her shoulders to repress a shudder whenever her shoulder blades, or the back of her head, made contact with his belly. It wasn't as hard as…the rest of his body, but she still didn't like it. He was almost as warm as the lava itself, and…and he was…_Bowser_…and she didn't want to touch him any more than she absolutely had to. A small part of her felt...uncomfortable with the reaction, because it was true that Bowser had done her…an uncharacteristic kindness in protecting her from the fireball. She supposed she should've been more appreciative. At least, that would be protocol (but since when did Bowser care about _protocol?_). Peach shivered to think of what would've happened to her without anyone to come along…but mind you, this…guilt was a _very _small part of what she felt towards him right now. He terrorized her kingdom – and her – repeatedly, without remorse, and tried to kill her dearest friends!

_The least he owes me_, Peach thought to herself self-righteously, resentfully, _is a short chauffeur ride to solid ground! _And that's exactly what this was. Her mistrust began to dwindle as Bowser took no unexpected detours – soon she found herself clutching onto the bike for dear life as Bowser zigzagged between the flaming geysers, but the finish line was in sight!

"Bow-wow-ser! Slow do-_own!_" Her voice wobbled as Bowser caught a jump off one of the geysers just seconds before it erupted, smashing into the ground so hard that the bike kicked up dust – and it only gave him a turbo boost. The checkered finish line was nothing more than a _blur _of color – this wasn't what they agreed on at all! "Bowser!" So much for 'trust' and 'appreciation'. Peach's head snapped forward and then she collided _hard _into his chest as he made the jump from the bridge to the castle once more – but instead of driving through the red carpet hallway, Bowser made a sharp detour to the left, just before the steps. The naivety in her thought, oh, maybe he _really _wanted to finish the race, maybe that was all but- no, this definitely wasn't part of the course. It never had been.

"Bowser, stop!" This time, she thought she managed a 'commanding' tone – but all she got in response was that deep, throaty guffaw that she'd learned to associate with cages and threats.

"_Buahahaha!_" Peach couldn't stand that laugh, and her ink smeared face twisted into a disgusted grimace as Bowser shoved his snout against her ponytail to hiss, "And lose again? Not a chance!" The Flame Runner sped through the frigid – or maybe it only felt frigid in contrast to the lava - arches of an unused hallway and Peach gritted her teeth with pinpricks of tears at the corners of her eyes. She knew this would happen. She knew it, she _knew _it and she let herself be tricked into thinking that…that he had…had _any _sort of chivalry!

"I trusted you!" she choked out, _betrayed _and stunned that she ever had enough faith in him to _feel _betrayed. It was-

"First mistake, Princess!" he didn't even have the grace to sound sorry – or remotely interested in what she had to say! "Evil, remember?" _Proud_, too. He was so pleased with himself. She'd been captured again, just like…_that_.

It upset her all the more because…because she loved this: the cups, the series, the entire sport. Toadsworth never approved of unseemly, risky activities – like racing, but for the morale of the kingdom and for the purposes of diplomacy he permitted her to participate. She loved the thrill of uncertainty and peril, the exciting places she saw, the people she met, and most importantly, the freedom she had. She protected herself – with green shells and quick reflexes – and she…she was equal with Mario, Luigi, even Daisy who was…arguably…well, she just…she'd always done things a little less…conventionally. It wasn't that Peach felt sorry for herself, or even felt as if she were a burden to her friends. It was just…well, she didn't see the harm in showing people, her people, that she was more than just a…damsel. She could…oh…what did Daisy always say? She could _pack a punch _too, and didn't have to fret over whether or not her actions seemed 'ladylike' enough because she was just playing the game! And she didn't _need _to be rescued because it was _safe _here. It was supposed to be _safe_ here.

She couldn't let Bowser take this away from her – and just imagine how it would ruin the event for everyone!  
>That wouldn't do at all.<p>

There was no way that Peach could wrestle the controls of the bike away from him – Bowser was too big, too strong, but she could still surprise him. She waited until she saw the end of the hallway – it formed a T, so he would have to turn one way or the other – and then she gingerly lifted her right leg to sit sideways – like she normally did when horseback riding – both feet on the left side of the motorcycle. The closer they drew to the inevitable fork in the castle, the more she leaned into the right crook of his massive arm and- and she- "Let me go!" She _slung _all of her weight to the left, grabbing the handlebar and pulling it towards her body _hard_.

"Hey!" The bike _did _jerk too far, smashing front first into a sharp stone corner – Peach's feet slipped off the motorcycle and she tried to duck beneath Bowser's arm while _he _was distracted regaining control over the- "_Not so fast!_" he snarled, both feet hitting the ground with a resounding _thump _as he steadied the bike with his weight, both hands free to snatch the princess _back _onto the Flame Runner, this time cradling her horizontally with a _yank _on her ponytail, blonde hair wrapped tightly around one clawed hand.

"Ow!" Peach gave up on her first escape, more or less immobilized, but she had a Plan B. It was- "Mario! _Mario, help me!_" She kicked and thrashed, even after Bowser clapped his other arm down over her knees to keep her from flailing _too _hard. "_Help! Luigi! Mario! He-e-elp me!"_

"STOP!" she didn't, and Bowser tried repeatedly to cut her off, "Pri- Pe- st- _shut up!_" He released her hair, if only to clap a hand over her face and silence the cries for 'help' from those idiot brothers. "_Shut. Up_." He felt like he was disciplining one of his kids – if with a gentler hand. Tough love. "Jeez, what's _wrong _with you- _oof!" _As a last ditch effort, Peach did a rather unladylike thing – well, not that she wasn't already humiliated – and _elbowed _Bowser as hard as she could in his fleshy stomach. Daisy would've been proud of her. "Enough!" Less than amused, the Koopa King leaned over her menacingly, pinning her down with a glower that would send even his bravest minions diving for cover, "Hey- I said _enough_. You don't cut this out, you're gonna wake up in a dungeon – got it?"

Peach didn't say anything because, well, she couldn't – but she nodded once, slightly, and that suited Bowser just fine if all she had to say was_ What's-his-face's _name. Or his dumb brother's. It was bad enough he – awesome king that he was – got stuck on the Red Team to begin with – he didn't like red much anymore, especially not on short fatties with too much facial hair.

Bowser didn't want to threaten her, but he didn't know how else to control her, and it was important she keep quiet so he could get her out of here. "If I…uh, move my hand, you gonna scream?" he asked finally, almost sheepishly. He watched her face intently – and not just because of her eyes. They were so blue. There was nothing like 'em. When _she _shook her head slowly, reluctantly, Bowser believed her – why? Because she wasn't an evil _king_, that's why. She was the kind of royal who kept her word. Princess Peach. She probably never lied a day in her life.

Besides, he was the best racer – claws down – in this whole stinking competition but he still couldn't steer his bike with no hands. Not if he wanted to make sure she stayed safe. So he eased his right hand off her mouth, after which the princess drew in a deep, angry breath between her lips. Whatever she meant to say, she didn't – Bowser cocked his head, having heard the bike first, recognized the type, but soon Peach heard it too. She was so hopeful that her hero had heard her after all that she only breathed his name, "Mario," without even questioning why Bowser was so relaxed. Was…at least, he had been…before she spoke. Stiffness rippled through his body, including the arm pinning her legs and he glared at her.

Then he smirked, but it wasn't a friendly expression. Truthfully, Peach didn't think Bowser _had _a friendly expression, but this was different. This was…mean. Even so, he was gentle enough in the way he slid his free hand beneath her back, lifting her up to sit her on the bike again properly. He kept an arm around her, the other on the steering, and the only reason Peach didn't fight was because she thought she was getting rescued. Imagine her surprise when Bowser turned the bike around to face the oncoming noise and-

"Sire! Your Nastiness! Your Supreme Foulness!" _No, this can't be_. Her heart ached as if it had plummeted from her chest to her feet, so swiftly that she felt sick and would have swayed were Bowser not so firm on acting his part as a Koopa seatbelt, holding her in place with but a fraction of his full strength. "My liege!" The incoming motorcyclist – who cried out an epithet for every few feet he covered – was not Mario at all, nor Luigi, nor Daisy, nor Toad. It was _Kooper_, that Koopa Troopa from the race! He'd be no help to her at all!

"Expecting your knight in no armor, Princess?" Bowser murmured mockingly, the taunt rumbling in his chest.

"He always finds me," she said airily, confidently, betraying in her voice none of the despair in her face. He couldn't see it anyway.

"You put too much faith in him." Flat. Surprisingly articulate - for Bowser, but he followed it up with a much more characteristic, "He's a schmuck." The humor was gone, and the ill-tempered growl had returned. Good. She preferred that anyway. She didn't need Bowser attempting to make _conversation _with her.

"My Lord Bowser!" Kooper declared reverently, slowing his bike a respectable few feet away from his king with a low bow of his yellow head. The inclination was meant for Peach too, whom he briefly acknowledged as, "Princess." Then it was right back to, "Your Maliciousness! Your Most Iniquitousness! Your-"

"What!" Bowser cut in with an impatient huff, scowling down at his minion, "You sniveling idiot, what is it!"

"O-of course, sir, my deepest apo-"

"NOW!"

"Yessir! The race has ended, sir! Our spy, sire, will delay the calibration of results for as long as possible – but eventually they will start to ask questions." Spy? Did he say spy? Now Peach was listening very intently, but the earnest Koopa Troopa only had eyes for his king. "I...humbly suggest, my lord, that you…vacate the premises. The Lakitu has informed me your Koopa Clown Car has been fully fueled and awaits your…your Most Malevolent…ness- er, Most…Malevolence- uh-" He fumbled and gulped at whatever Bowser's expression must have been, the last few words tumbling out of his mouth, "_atopthenorttower, _sir!"

"Good." Good? Peach disagreed – and tried to process what she'd just heard. Who calibrated the results? Why, the referee was the one to say who'd crossed the finish line first...unless it was very close, in which case, instant replay was your best friend. A beat later – and Bowser heaved a hostile snarl to see the uncertain Koopa Troopa hadn't budged from his position- "What are you standin' around for? A tip? Get outta here! I don't want Mario and his buddies trailing your sorry butt back to me!"

"Oh!" Kooper started with a bob of his head, "Yessir! Thank you, my lord!"

The Lakitu. The spy. The…referee? While Kooper revved up his standard bike and sharply U-Turned back the way he'd come, Bowser took advantage of Peach's silence to kick things into gear – the North Tower, two turns and one staircase – but he didn't get far before the Mushroom Princess tilted her head up, shocked but _furious_, "Referees are supposed to be _impartial_, Bowser!"

He didn't look at her – if he'd tried, the angle would've been too awkward. He always has trouble looking directly down past his snout – although you'd never hear him admit it. "No Koopa's _impartial _to me," he said, the egotism just…_dripping _from his words, "Find me one that is, and I'll stomp him in the ground!" Well now, that wasn't true- she'd known…one or two that were…perfectly helpful. They would never- she didn't think- it didn't _matter!_

"You cheated!" _That _mattered. "You- you _bribed _a referee!" Or threatened, or Stars knew what! What did this mean? Saying it aloud, it helped her think – blue eyes flashing in recognition. Her accident, her lost bike, the Lakitu with his fishing pole…he was…. "You…_you _were the reason I didn't get my bike back! You! You didn't save me from- from anything! You set me up! Bowser! You _lied _to me!" The only reason the Lakitu wouldn't have lifted her back onto the track was…because he was ordered not to. Bowser did- he- he made no effort to _defend _himself, so she knew it was true.

The entire...race...the cup...the _series_, it had all been a trap.  
>Peach was not one to hate indiscriminately - but he- she- how would she ever set things right now?<p> 


	3. Time Out

**A/N:** Review responses at end of chapter. Thanks, everyone! :) We'll have more Bowser-centric viewpoints in the coming chapters, I promise. As usual, I don't own anything (except maybe the convertible-esque qualities of the new and improved Clown Car).

**EDIT: **Because my Daisy & co. centric section of this chapter turned out so long, I decided to break it up. Sorry for an confusion!

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><p>Where the heck was Peach?<p>

After the Lakitu set her back down on the track, Daisy had fallen into the very spot she'd sneered at Bowser over – eighth. She caught a lucky break with a bullet bill that sent her skyrocketing through the trickiest part of the course, and three mushrooms, one red shell, and one well-placed banana peel later, she'd crossed the finish line in third place. It was a good (not _great, _but good) comeback, made all the better by the fact that the man in first? _Mario_. Peach would love it – in fact, Daisy wasn't the only one who was surprised when, crossing the finish line and tossing a triumphant glance over her shoulder, she didn't see so much as a glimpse of her cousin's signature pink bike. Pulling up next to Mario on their fourth victory lap, she asked him if he'd seen his girl – he hadn't. So, concerned, Daisy pulled off-road and urged Mario to follow her – Luigi too, whom she flagged down with a wave and shout – so that they could celebrate together. But Peach never _came_.

Daisy signaled other racers - at least, the ones who would give her the time of day. Toad hadn't seen her, neither had Diddy Kong (or so Daisy guessed from what he hooted with a pound of his closed fist against his chest). Had she just not crossed the finish line? That was a major delay - what could've caused it?

Toad chose to stay behind with them – foregoing his fourth lap to wait for Peach in case she crossed the finish line much later than her competitors. Meanwhile, Daisy, Mario, and Luigi took off through the castle circuit to find her. Maybe she was stranded, as unlikely as Daisy thought it would be. Some of those jumps were tough, but she and Peach had raced together since…well, since before Toadsworth even allowed it.

"She's a great driver!" Daisy insisted loudly over the froth of lava and the trio's combined bikes, "I don't know how this happened!" The last time she'd seen her cousin, Peach had been in the lead.

"Let's-a just see what we find, capisce?" Luigi. He didn't want her jumping to conclusions, and she didn't mind being reminded of that at the moment, mumbling a supportive, _"Right_," under her breath. It wasn't easy, though, as each turn proved to be a disappointment. Peach wasn't trapped in a trouble spot, or tending to mechanical malfunctions. The threesome had only to spot Toad's spotted, mushroom head as he shook it from side to side sadly, a frown tugging at his lips, to confirm the bad news. They slowed their bikes. Peach didn't finish the race. Peach wasn't even on the track.

"S-s-something's happened to her," he blurted out, drawing the worst of conclusions, anxiety pitching his voice higher than usual as the three heroes pulled their bikes up next to his much smaller Quacker. "The princess! This is all my fault!" he all but wailed, having failed in his responsibilities to Peach during the race. He hadn't even been the one to notice she was missing! "Mario, Mario, what should we do?" In any time of crisis, he – and most of Mushroom Kingdom – relied on the man in red to set things right. "Please bring her back!"

Daisy exchanged a brief look with Luigi over his brother's head, one that implied, 'what are we, chopped horsetail tarts?' Their gazes met but briefly before the princess let down her kickstand and slid off her bike. Peach was much more the comforter than Daisy, but the brunette did the best she could in crouching down next to Toad, a hand on his shoulder accompanying the reassurance, "It's not your fault," Toad wasn't the only one who let the competition get the best of him – and Daisy spoke from her own sense of responsibility, "We'll find her." Mario echoed the sentiment, his mustache twitching briefly in concern. Daisy could tell that he was worried. "Why don't you go join the rest of the racers?"

Mario snapped his fingers just then – the other racers, of course. Even if their fellow athletes hadn't seen anything (something Daisy wanted to confirm for herself), everyone knew that the Special Cup Series was televised live. "Good-a thinking, bro. We gotta get our hands on those-a cameras," Luigi agreed, and so they had a plan. Once Daisy jumped back onto her Dasher, the quartet joined the others gathered off-track to hear the ranking announcements, dismounting from their bikes. At least, they were _supposed _to be doing that – but it was absolute chaos! Diddy Kong pounded the ground with both knuckles, agitated, and he wasn't the only one-

"I smell _cheaters!_" shouted the very _thorn _in Daisy's side – ever since she'd learned who their sixth teammate was – lean, mean, and threatening. He shook his fist at the stuttering Lakitu hovering in a cloud just out of reach, raging, "Only cheaters need to recount the votes!" Daisy just rolled her eyes – this wasn't even a _voting _style race, why did he always have to do this? Whatever the Lakitu said in response was drowned out by Waluigi's insistent, "Nobody cheats better than _me!_ I wanna see the replay!"

"Oh pipe _down!_" Daisy couldn't stand him going off like that, whining, and only her voice had him swiveling around, pencil thin mustache quivering, as he eyed her – and her company – with dissatisfaction. Sure, he was on her team – but that didn't mean Daisy had to _support _his bad attitude. "We have a serious problem!" It was much more important than Waluigi's fabricated claims of 'cheating'.

"I'll say!" he retorted loudly, leering at Daisy unapologetically, "Look at your choice in _men_- ow!" Wario had never thought much of his brother's attempts to _show off _for his rival's girl – and with a grunt, he shoved his taller counterpart from behind roughly, to which Waluigi responded with a whiplash snap of his head and a push of his own, "Cut it out, you fat bastard!" A fight broke out between the brothers – but Daisy didn't have _time _for that.

"Listen! Peach is missing!" she cried emphatically, but her words didn't have the intended effect. "Hello? _Heeelllllooo?"_ Priorities, people? In fact, she wasn't even sure everyone was here. Who was missing? Well, there were the bickering brothers, Diddy Kong (who leapt forward to earn himself a front row seat to the fray, his tail curling upwards into a backwards questionmark), Toad, herself, of course, Mario, Luigi, that brute B- wait.

"Who's the person we _always _look to whenever Peach gets snatched?" she asked suddenly. It was a rhetorical question, one that dawned on her – and the Mario Brothers – with dread. Because that 'person'…um, he wasn't here either.

"Bowser." Luigi and Mario said it in unison, neither one pleased.

"Bowser," confirmed Daisy grimly, "That's our clue." It was too much of a coincidence that the Koopa King – who never missed a chance to gloat, boast, and swagger – would go missing during the exact same race as Peach. "We- hey, where'd he go?" The Lakitu had disappeared in the confusion caused by the still scuffling brothers, with only Yoshi's green snout upturned to the sky. "We need to see what happened!"

Luigi, whose lips had pressed into a thin, invisible line beneath his 'stache in response to Waluigi's digs, gazed between the empty air and Daisy's worried face. The hero in him simply couldn't resist the promise, "Don't-a worry, Daisy. I'll-a get the cameras." After Luigi left, it was Mario who suggested that in the interim, he do another round on the circuit. _She _insisted on going with him, and Toad would stay with the group, his eyes peeled for any glimpse of Peach _or _Bowser. He didn't have to look far – in fact, none of them did, because was it just Daisy or was _somebody _slow in rejoining the group?

Kooper the Koopa Troopa was coming straight towards them on his bike – a Magikruiser – in what had to be the most suspiciously 'innocent' entrance she'd ever seen (or maybe she was just a tad oversensitive, on account of her _best friend _– they were more than just cousins - _going missing_).

Mario's expression told her he suspected something similar – either way, they'd have questioned him eventually. _Better get this over with_. The two hopped their bikes and met the Koopa halfway. By 'met', of course, Daisy meant that Mario was front and center while she came in from the left side in an effort to block his escape routes (it was better than _nothing _for such a short-notice plan).

"Kooper!" Daisy started in on the interrogation before Mario even had the chance to open his mouth – and she held out her hand in the clear signal for 'stop'. The Koopa Troopa's eyes darted from one side to the other, but it seemed that coming face to face with Mario was enough of a deterrent to keep him from…any foolish actions.

"Uh, Your Highness?" he said carefully, braking his bike and having to speak over it. He nodded to her – and to Mario, even though the Koopa couldn't seem to address _him _directly.

"Where's Peach?" Daisy didn't waste any time with small talk, instead indicating with a wide sweep of her hand, "I'm sure you've noticed she's not _here_." _With the rest of us_.

"Princess Toadstool?" As if he needed the confirmation, as if he didn't know. His eyes bulged in exaggerated surprise, "I don't know, ma'am."

Ma'am? Who was he calling _ma'am_? "Oh really?" The Koopa nodded once, tightening his fingers on the handlebars of his bike, but Daisy just didn't buy it. "Where were you just now? And _don't _say-" she warned before he could answer, "-on the track because we were just there!"

He closed his mouth. For a moment. Then, "I…had to go to the Little Koopa's Room." That was his excuse? The _bathroom? _"There wasn't any toilet paper so it…took awhile…Your Highness." One, that was disgusting. Two, disgusting was probably the _point_. To get her off his trail, right?

"Hm." She seemed to accept this, but if Kooper thought he could relax (he didn't), he had something else coming. "You won second place," she reminded him, though she couldn't remember seeing him after a momentary flash of green shell before she crossed the finish line. She didn't know where he'd gone off to after that, "I would've thought you'd want to…do your victory lap."

The Koopa Troopa just shook his head uneasily, supplying the words, "I really had to go." To the bathroom. Riiiight.

"You're lying." She felt secure enough in her accusation, the tiptoes of her boots steadying her on either side of the Dasher so she could sit tall, regal, and – she thought – intimidating. "Bowser's missing too. I don't suppose you know _anything _about that either?" The Koopa shook his head again, but she thought she saw his stubby fingers reaching to squeeze the gas. His foot was moving too – to the clutch, maybe? Daisy shot a look at Mario, but he'd already thought three steps ahead – and currently gripped a humming red shell, leftover after the race, under his arm.

"You're coming with us," Daisy insisted, hopping off her bike with a sharp gesture that indicated Kooper was to do the same, "That's _not _a request." If he valued his shell and his bike, he wouldn't try anything. He wouldn't stand a chance. Instead of attempting to escape, his shoulders slumped low and Daisy only had a moment to feel triumphant before the Koopa's eyes hardened and he _hit _the gas, charging straight towards them with an angry wheelie – his tires would've squealed if they'd been on asphalt – and Daisy shouted, "Mario!" with a dive to the side just before his well-timed shell _smashed _into the bike, stopping it short of colliding with the duo. This wasn't exactly what she'd hope would come out of this, but an unconscious Koopa Troopa was better than none at all.

She got to her feet, dusting off her dirt-streaked suit carelessly. The princess was completely unfazed by the violence that had blown the Koopa Troopa several feet in the air, because she knew it wasn't serious. Coincidentally, it also drew some of the _attention _she'd wanted for her announcement in the first place. While she parked her bike for good and approached their enemy to inspect the damage, she scarcely noticed King Boo's overt curiosity as he floated within hearing distance of the two heroes and the knocked-out koopa.

"He's done something with her – again, I just know it," Daisy said, "We have to split up and search the castle – everyone. They can't have gotten far – the race _just _ended!" Mario agreed with her, and while she helped turn the Magikruiser upright, Mario scooped up Bowser's henchman as if he was nothing. They were so strong, him and Luigi both. She paused to admire it for a second – and in that second, failed to notice King Boo disappear without so much as a _pop. _

She had bigger problems.

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><p><strong><span>AN:** Wow, I'm super flattered that the great and wonderful **superblooper **commented on my story! Thanks so much! :) Also, thanks to **James Birdsong **and **nationalcraft** (I really appreciate you bringing my excessive use of ellipses to mind - I do tend to use them as a reflection of Peach's own uncertainty, or the way she's thinking - but in writing, they really are cumbersome. I edited my previous chapters to try to minimize them, and will keep that in mind in future chapters! Thanks again!).

Much appreciation to everyone who has given my story a chance! 1Ups to all!


	4. The Spook in the Spokes

**A/N:** As I mentioned in my **edit **on Chapter 3, there's nothing new about this (it's just been split in half). As you've probably guessed, we'll be having a couple stories. The first (and more important) - Peach/Bowser. The second involves the rest of the racers and the search for Peach/Bowser. I hope it works out well, never done this before so - I would totally appreciate any feedback! Thanks! :)

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><p>Peach only had one.<p>

Problem, that is. But _he _was plenty big. Bowser's grip was stronger than iron, and although she tried to slip away – she couldn't. He even snarled in her ear that she ought to stop squirming. It was hard on him. The implication disgusted her, shocked her so much that she stopped moving _entirely_– and her propriety wouldn't allow her any comfort as the Flame Runner rocketed up a steep, narrow spiral staircase. Her teeth chattered together so hard, she nearly bit her tongue, but a headache was the least of her worries as they reached the hexagonal, stone surface of the tower top. Spires jutted out sharply from all directions and the Clown Car seemed so bright and out-of-place with its wide (and in her mind, frightening) grin and hemispheric orange eyes.

"It looks…different." She didn't mean to say it aloud, the words simply slipped out. She hadn't seen the Koopa Clown Car in many months and it just seemed…bigger than last time.

"Oh yeah, latest model," Bowser replied proudly, surprised and pleased that she'd noticed. He dismounted his bike and – with a heavy hand on her shoulder after some debate – allowing Peach the freedom to do the same. "Great storage space." Plus better cannons, and a laser gun in its mouth. "Check it out." He released her, if only to pick up his bike by the seat and handlebars as if it weighed nothing. The Koopa King was just trying to show off when he carried it across the North Tower with one hand to drop it in the back of the copter. Too bad Peach was a little too preoccupied with escape to admire the muscles of his forearms and the ease with which he handled the Flame Runner. The second his back was turned – she ran for the very staircase they'd just ascended, only to skid to a stop with a _scream _as _it _appeared.

No, not it, _him_.

Swelling in size with a toothy grin and a chilling laugh, King Boo sent Peach stumbling backwards, lest she collide with the menacing monarch. Where did _he _come from? He looked down at her, the signature smile fading – in recognition.

Then- "Guh!" gasped King Boo, baring his teeth in what must've passed for a ghostly recoil. Apparently she startled him as much as he startled her. A moment later, he eased closer to Peach, bobbing in the air with an intrigued expression. "I say, Princess Toadstool, you look…_terrifying_."

_What? _"What?"

Despite herself – and all of this – Peach wasn't above vanity, or the scarlet blush of embarrassment that stained her cheeks as the floating royal carried on in an amused, aristocratic creak, "Isn't it backwards? Terror is _my _raison d'etre, after all. But you-"

"Hey! Balloon Boy!" Bowser aggressively cut in, stomping over to the pair – he was already annoyed that Boo interrupted his chance to impress Peach with the new Copter, but nobody insulted _his _princess, "Lay off. She looks great." King Boo merely smiled broadly, seemingly unperturbed by the Koopa's tactlessness, and drew back from the princess with a shake of his proportionally smaller arms. Peach felt Bowser lumber up behind her, the way his body cast a shadow over hers – and she flinched when she felt a claw touch her back. "You do look great."

"No, I don't!" Peach snapped in response, jerking away from Bowser and stepping back from both of them, furious. The thought of _him _comforting her – or flattering her when she knew better – was unbearable. "My _bike _is gone! My _suit _is ruined! My _hair _is ruined! This ink _stinks _and it's _all your fault!_" There were far more important things than her wardrobe that she took issue with, but for now, it was the safest thing to mention.

"Whoa!" Bowser protested to her outburst, "You think _I _did that?" She just looked at him. "I'd never attack you, Peach!"

"No, just my _kingdom. _My _friends._" Bowser could be so…_deluded_, and while she'd always known this, it just seemed _particularly _evident right now. "Everything I care about. And what do you call this?" She indicated the very obvious stains with an angry flourish.

"Oh, Princess, I'm afraid the blooper was my idea," King Boo confessed mirthfully, lazily sinking down to eye contact level with the fuming Peach, "Forgive me, but Bowser was very specific. He didn't want you hurt, only…stalled." Stalled. She blinked once, putting the pieces together – first the Lakitu, now King Boo. All just to make him seem like the hero he would _never _be – she thought it was so…so _pathetic_. It was such a harsh word, but it needed to be used. She needed to be reminded of her mistake. Her lapse in judgment. She'd willingly gotten onto the bike with him, after all – it made her wince, the thought of what everyone would think, would say when they saw it. She should've been smarter.

Daisy would never have fallen for something so foolish.

While Peach very subtly wiped a would-be tear from her left eye, Bowser was eager to get rid of the kidnapping crasher. "I thought I told you to stick close to the Stupid Brothers," he demanded, "Find out what they know."

"That's why I'm here," King Boo replied, "They've found your Koopa Troopa."

"Already?" The Koopa tyrant was disgruntled, to say the least, muttering, "I have morons for minions."

"Mm," was the noncommittal reply, before the ghost added, "That's why I always say, never send…well…_anyone _to do a Boo's job. The little ones are so cute, too." He fondly believed that added an extra layer of deception.

Bowser scowled derisively in response. "I don't do 'cute'." He didn't need anybody else insulting his forces, alright? Especially not some puny bobble head without a body – like this guy.

King Boo glanced past the defensive Koopa to the petite and sniffling princess who, he knew, beneath all that wear and tear and _muck_, was quite…_cute_. By human standards. "Cleaaaarly," he drawled, unable to resist poking a bit of fun. But one glance to the Koopa King's face, and he thought better of further ridicule and added, "Those wimpy humans think you're still in the castle, skulking about somewhere – but don't you worry about that!" he cackled humorously, completely oblivious – or immune – to the fact that he was the only one laughing. "I've been working on my reptilian roar – I like my odds."

"You're going to lose," Peach declared steadily, having pulled herself together enough not to cry in _front _of them, "You _always _lose."

Bowser bristled – visibly – but King Boo eyed her with the selfsame good-humor that bordered on sinister. "Perhaps," he admitted – something the Koopa never would've done – "But not today." That was the only address he gave her, before two, much smaller Boos were willed into existence, flanking their master. "Take these," he offered to his scaly counterpart, and a thought was enough to command the ghosts to float over to Peach, circling the princess as they faded in and out of existence playfully. "As guards. She'll only try to escape again."

Instead of gratitude (did he even know the meaning of the word?), Bowser growled with a threatening step forward. "I know how to kidnap my own princess." He didn't need charity.

King Boo only chuckled, flashing a row of sharp canines and a sliver of pink tongue. "Your record speaks for itself." He didn't take the Boos back, but his beady eyes fixated on the princess once more. "Always a pleasure, Your Highness." Still laughing, the great ghost simply teleported away - and Peach closed her eyes briefly, squeezing them shut in frustration. Perhaps she was only fooling herself – to think these races could ever amount to anything remotely similar to _peace_. Just because everyone could play nice for a few days out of the year, pandering to the cameras – did it really mean so little? Now those arduous hours spent negotiating fractions of taxes and land rights...

"Let's go."

"No." Peach didn't inch towards the exit - Bowser was too close for that, but she did glance between it and the Koopa. And she did hold her ground.

"Wasn't an invitation, Princess."

"Please don't do this." Appealing to his 'better' half was hardly her brightest move - anything would've been better, for she already knew it would end in abject failure. He _had _no better half. "Bowser, please." She extended her hands in what was meant to be a placating gesture, empty palms, as she stood in front of him. It wasn't difficult for Peach to look as unassuming as possible, but she had hoped that in _emphasizing _it, she could somehow convince Bowser that this wasn't...the way. It- "You don't know what you're doing."

That was her mistake. The single tear-track on her cheek, sharply visible against the ink, the miserable plea behind her words, it _did _give him pause. But the second she said _he _didn't know what he was doing? "I'm a king! I _always _know what I'm doing! _We're going!_" He grabbed her then, tossed her over his shoulder with ease - and Peach's composure completely failed her...again.

"No! No- let me go!" She couldn't reason with him. It just wasn't possible! He only understood one thing - and that was her hero, just _wiping _the floor with him."Mario! _Mario!_" She thought her voice might carry over the top of the tower, but Bowser scarcely gave her the chance, _dumping _her into the passenger's side of the Clown Car. By the time she scrambled up, he'd already cleared the other side and, upon landing in the driver's seat - he hit a flurry of buttons and the transparent glass rose with a mechanical groan on all sides - not dissimilar from a convertible top. It connected with the windshield easily, encasing him...and his princess...in the airship. Even if she screamed, the only person who'd hear it was _him_.

She didn't. What Bowser hadn't seen was Peach hurriedly strip one long glove from her right arm - which she flung over the side of the Clown Car just before the windows raised. She only stayed quiet now so as not to draw his attention to it - another sequence of buttons, and the copter's engine rumbled to life. Seconds later, and the rotors kicked in lift them into the air. Peering out the window, she could see her glove, so out-of-place against the stone_._She might not have been...relieved, but...it was better than nothing. Peach took in a shallow breath, attempting to ease her nerves, and covered her ungloved arm as much as possible. _Please, Mario, please find me._

"Peach."

Bowser attempted to speak to her once he'd navigated the Clown Car's take-off from the tower top, rising up into smoggy, outcast skies that obscured their escape perfectly. He didn't have to keep both eyes on the controls, so he looked at her instead. Even her profile was pretty, and that was all she gave him.

"Peach." The princess steadfastly ignored him – and the intermittent giggle of the two Boos disappearing and reappearing in her periphery. Apparently they'd decided to tag along. She crossed her arms over her chest, comforted only by the fact that she'd left her glove behind – surely someone would find it, and once they did, they'd realize that Bowser would only take her to the top of a tower for one reason: escape. Her friends were smart, they would know how he kidnapped her – and that was one step in the right direction, wasn't it? They would know she wasn't in the castle anymore. If only she could've warned them about King Boo…

"_Peach_," he repeated impatiently, a few minutes later. All he got in response was the tittering of a Boo who, when he twisted to glare at it, merely covered its face with both hands coyly. Bowser wasn't in the mood for games. "Get lost!" he snapped, "It's cramped enough in here." Who knew if the ghosts were really gone – but they disappeared on command and that was all that mattered. Bowser didn't want to _see_an audience – hell, he didn't need the help at all. He could handle the princess on his own.

Even if she wanted to give him the silent treatment.

"Peach, I didn't bribe anybody, alright?" Still nothing. Bowser cleared his throat, annoyed, but barged on – as was his nature, "I mean, why would _I _have to do _that_?" When he could just threaten his victims into submission. He realized a little too late _that _probably wasn't what Peach wanted to hear, so he explained, "I just got rid of the ref, replaced him with one of my minions." Peach's gaze was downcast, into her lap, and she was grateful for it so he wouldn't see her reaction. Every referee was thoroughly vetted to prevent _just _this sort of thing – biases, or cheating – and she did feel some measure of relief to know that Bowser hadn't…_infiltrated _the racing competition so drastically. He'd never been very good at espionage, which was why she'd been so horrified at the thought. "Koopas all look the same to outsiders anyway – except for _me_, 'cause I'm the King. Nobody looks as good as me."

_Nobody is as awful as you either_, she thought. The princess was brooding. And she felt…filthy. The only recoverable parts of her entire wardrobe were…the boots, and even then, she dreaded the trouble it would cause her laundresses.

"Are you just gonna ignore me until we get there?"

_Yes_. She didn't even know where 'there' was, but the answer was still 'yes'. She wanted to ask about the referee, how horribly Bowser must have punished him for remaining loyal to the morals of his prestigious position – but she didn't think she could stand the answer. And she didn't want to encourage him. Once Mario rescued her, she would make it her mission to find that Lakitu.

Bowser had a mission of his own: to get Peach's attention. It wasn't an easy trip between kingdoms; he ought to know, he'd made it plenty of times before. And, uh, it'd be nice if she...would just _look _at him. Once. But he wasn't used to making repeat overtures - and he was getting annoyed. As a last ditch effort, he added gruffly, "'Cause...it's a long way to Mushroom Castle."

_There_. She raised her head - lips parting to form a small 'o' of surprise, eyes raised to his. "Mushroom Castle?" she repeated, and Bowser swallowed to mask how much his mood improved by such minor gestures. "But- why?"

Ah, this was even better. She was _interested_. And since she was already his captive, he didn't mind unveiling the genius that was his amazing plan. "Yeah," he said easily, his tone cocky, almost condescending, "You think I'm gonna keep you in Dark Land? Everybody's already there." The Idiot Brothers, her loudmouthed cousin, even her steward and best attendants. "I'm not that stupid." But _her _castle? Nobody would expect it!

"Bowser, you can't be serious." He'd anticipated her awe at his awesomeness - but in his mind, it wasn't with _that _tone. Or _that _expression. She just didn't get it. "You know as well as anyone that the season _ends _in Mushroom Kingdom. We have the awards ceremony at my home every year." Toad Town would be brimming with racing fans from all over the world - every hostel and inn booked for the next week, all in preparation for the great parade, the feast, the festivities to follow. This was one of the busiest, most lucrative times of year for the kingdom's tourist industry. An absolute blessing for the local economy. How could Bowser possibly think this was _smart_? He'd already attempted to take over her castle - and failed. That was before the population all but doubled! And it wasn't just Toad Town. Visiting dignitaries, guests, additional staff, all moving in and out of Mushroom Castle constantly. Bowser had no idea what he was doing - again.

"Yeah, yeah," details, details, he didn't care about those, "But they can't have the _ceremony _without the _princess_." By the time those stupid plumbers realized where she was - _if _they even figured it out - it'd be too late. But he didn't want to ruin that surprise for her just yet.

Still, with the information she had? Peach could make one objective judgment for certain. "This is a-" _terrible idea_. She stopped herself short with a small intake of air. Had she really been trying to _help _Bowser? Not intentionally, but his plan just sounded so…silly. If he took her to Mushroom Castle, she would be rescued within hours – she would have so many ample opportunities to sneak a message out to Mario through one of her subjects. Peach fell silent as her hopes weighed down on her thoughts, and she hid a very small smile. There was a way to salvage what Bowser had done: she just had to think smart, and he'd done half the work for her already. There was no better place for the Mushroom Princess to make her _own _move than in her own castle.

"It's a what?" Oh. Bowser was still waiting on the rest of her statement – and the way he shifted, shot brief looks at her, Peach might've thought he _cared _about what she had to say. But of course, that was ridiculous. He just couldn't mind his own business, as always.

"It's a…despicable idea," she corrected herself, a complaint that he took as the greatest of compliments, so much so that even his thick tail straightened up at the judgment passed.

"I _am _the most evil king around." And he really thought that was a 'good' thing.

_Mario will come for me_. _He'll put you in your place – again_. And she would do everything in her power to help him.


	5. Extra Leg Room Required

**A/N:** Thanks so much for the review, **Ikuni Hattori**! This chapter took a day longer than I'd anticipated, but here it is! It's a bit of a filler (sorry!), but we'll finally get into major BowserxPeach one-on-one time in the next chapter. Thanks to all who've read - please leave a review if you have the time, I'd love to hear your feedback!

As usual (and as always), I own none of the characters!

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><p>Any trip would seem insufferable under these circumstances – but to be subjected to such discomfort while clad in a full-body racing suit, stiff and stained with ink and sweat and tears, it was even worse. Peach resented Bowser for his inopportune timing (she didn't even have the chance to rinse off) almost as much as for the abduction itself. She spoke to him rarely, looked at him never, and plotted her escape for several hours. Her dour mood only began to lift as the sky lightened and the jigsaw plots of land below grew verdant and lush. Even the air, she imagined, smelled and tasted fresher here. She'd traveled extensively over the past year, to qualifying races throughout hers and neighboring kingdoms – although she was thrilled at having the opportunity to represent her people at the Special Cup this year, she missed home. She always looked forward to this time of year in Toad Town, but it would've been particularly significant had she placed – both as an individual and as part of her team. This year was the first year that Peach and all of her close friends had qualified for the Cup, and she thought it would've been wonderful – if not for Bowser.<p>

As unfortunate as this turn of events was, Peach couldn't help a small sigh of contentment as she peered down at sloping, green hills, light gray stone tipped in cinnamon red shingles, the zenith of every tower. It was such a strange feeling, to have Bowser abduct her from his home to bring her here; usually, it was the other way around. She clasped her hands together in her lap, fingers interwoven to still their trembling. She was both happy to see something so familiar, while she dreaded the thought of-

"Bowser!" The Clown Car had begun its descent, and if she weren't staring so intently, she wouldn't have seen it – a sudden flash of red and yellow, shaped like honeycombs fitted together. She didn't see just one or two, flung haphazardly into the air, no, she saw a _net_. Like a picture, she glimpsed but a moment as the colors surrounded the airship, casting everything in an orangey light – and beyond, she could've sworn this…hive wall, it covered…everything. Had she imagined it? "What _was _that?" Peach twisted around in her seat, to no avail: she saw nothing but blue skies.

"You saw it?" _Of course she saw it, idiot_. Bowser was surprised – it was supposed to be undetectable, period, but especially to humans. Then again, Peach was so much more than the average human. "I mean, uh," she was looking at him now – so he had to make it sound good. Bowser dryly added, "You think I didn't come prepared?" For the long haul? That he didn't know she'd try to escape? If she didn't, one of those stompable Shroomies would slip out to stutter out a warning to Mario. Nah, not this time. Not until he got what he came here for.

Peach just looked away, and Bowser inwardly cursed. She hadn't said more than two words to him on their way over, so this was his shot. She wanted to know what she'd just seen – well, hey, he was the king with the answers. "It's a barrier some of my minions cooked up. It's pretty cool, actually." _Is she even listening? _"Nothing gets in or out unless it's with me. You're lucky." Bowser Barrier. He liked the sound of that – more stuff ought to be named after him. The magic was all tied up in his blood – king blood – and since he was the one and only, it was foolproof. Kamek explained it to him before they left for the race, but he'd been busy shining his bike until it showed his reflection. He was one good-looking Koopa. That ugly plumber didn't stand a chance.

She was beautiful. And good. She was especially good. Too good for that-

"Why am I lucky?" Huh. Was she fishing for compliments or something?

At first, Bowser didn't know how to respond – and when he didn't, she touched him. She put a hand on his forearm, and his claws practically spasmed over the controls, causing the Clown Car to pitch forward suddenly. Bowser righted it with an embarrassed growl, but Peach didn't even notice, pressing urgently, "Why did you say that? What did you do? Where are my retainers? My maids? I have _friends _in the castle, Bowser, those are _innocent _Toads."

"What?" She was speaking too fast for him to keep up – but he instantly felt defensive. He didn't like her tone. "I don't know what you're _talking _about!"

"Some of them are _children_." Peach had gotten carried away – by fear. Without her parents, her steward, herself – what horrible things might have happened in her absence? This was her responsibility, and Bowser just- "How could you?" She didn't like the magic. She didn't like coming home to it. The last time he'd held her hostage in her own kingdom, her own castle, he trapped her in a _window _– and she wasn't the only one who had to suffer for his greed.

Bowser still hadn't followed her train of thought – but he picked up on one thing as the Clown Car landed with a rough _thunk _on the grounds directly behind the castle. "Kids? You think I'd hurt _kids_?" Like any of those Mushrooms were worth his time, let alone extra small ones. He might step on one _by accident_, but it wasn't his fault they were so puny and- "I've got eight of my own, sheesh!" She _knew _that, she met 'em herself on her birthday. What kind of a guy did she think he was? Bowser was genuinely indignant, and it showed in his face – not that she even noticed. He couldn't stand that.

He wanted her to see him as a ruthless tyrant, sure, 'cause what was more impressive than that? But the way she _sounded_, like she wouldn't have been surprised if he offed a bunch of baby shrooms? Seriously? Not exactly the image of evil he was trying to convey. So when a platoon of Koopa Troopas surged forward obediently to greet him, he snapped orders for the princess to be taken away. He needed to think.

Peach wanted to get away from Bowser as quickly as possible – so she didn't argue, allowing the two koopas to help her out of the Clown Car. She couldn't even summon concern for her untidy appearance, so seized was she with apprehension. The castle was never empty, always bustling – and to see so many of Bowser's…_minions_, oh, she hoped they hadn't hurt anyone. She saw none of the castle staff on the way to her room (which she had to direct her guards to, as they'd gotten themselves turned around), which only worried her more. Peach attempted to ask her escorts about the Toads, but was told regretfully that they had their orders – and they weren't supposed to speak to her.

She was given a modicum of privacy in her bedroom, although it gave her no relief; she assumed the Koopa Troopas would station themselves outside the door, as always. The polished hardwood floors, delicate white and gold trim against pink walls, canopied bed…she couldn't enjoy any of it. She locked herself in the bathroom before she started to cry, confident that the rush of running water would mask the sounds. She took a bath as well, stripping off her suit, her glove, her boots, sinking into soapy water that rapidly turned a murky shade of gray as she scrubbed the long-dried blooper ink from her skin and hair. Peach drained the marble tub and rinsed herself off a second time before she wrapped her body and hair in two large fluffy pink towels and stood in front of her vanity. She stared at her reflection, distorted slightly by steam, and tried to gather her thoughts. What should she do? She couldn't just stand here.

The princess wiped away – with a damp fingertip - the smallest of black specks on her crown before she carried it into her bedroom. She left it on the bed, and had only just unwrapped her hair (tangled and wet) when she heard a very small voice.

"Your Highness!"

The startled Peach turned towards the sound, instinctively clutching her towel closer to her body – at first, she only saw a bobble of pink from the balcony, gasping in relief, "Toadette!" as the toadstool girl flung herself into the room and, in a not-so-rare display of emotion, wrapped her arms around the princess (at least, what she could reach). It was a surprisingly strong hug that nearly sent Peach stumbling. "Where did you come from? What is this?" She carefully reached down to pull Toadette off of her legs so that she could crouch, eye-level with one of her very favorite attendants. She held the Toad's hands in her own. "Are you okay?"

Poor Toadette's face was absolutely wet with tears, her eyes puffy, cheeks flushed. She was very upset, and Peach felt so guilty. Had she but an inkling of what Bowser intended to do… "I-I'm fine, we're all…we're fine, just…I wasn't sure it was you, at first and I-I didn't want to disrupt your bath."

Peach's own face colored at the explanation, and she felt an overwhelming sense of…she couldn't even put it into words. "There is nothing that would've made me happier than to have you interrupt, Toadette," she insisted, knowing in the back of her mind that she just set herself up for potential trouble down the road in terms of…bathroom privacy, but right now, she simply didn't care. "Oh, I was so worried!" She hugged the girl, and pulled away only to ask, "What happened here?"

Toadette wasted no time – having the princess' full attention – to admit thickly, "It was terrible!" Peach couldn't imagine. "These magikoopas came to the castle, they practically surrounded it - and they cast this…this _spell_. We can't leave the grounds – no one has dared to try, there are too many guards. They put everyone in the cellar, but I escaped. I hid here, in your room, I wanted to wait for…Mario." Her voice took on a dreamy turn at the mention of his name, and Peach cast a longing look to the portrait of him on her wall. It was a reminder, of course, that he would always come for her.

But she couldn't afford to be distracted. She needed to find a way to _reach _Mario and first- "The cellar?" Bowser turned her cellar into a _dungeon? _"But it's filthy down there!" Almost a sewer of sorts. While she was thankful to know that none of the castle's inhabitants had been harmed, imprisonment was not much of an improvement. "That is unacceptable!" Before she knew what she was doing, Peach had straightened and stepped towards her bedroom door – and was only stopped by Toadette's clearing of her throat. Loudly.

"Princess," she said, when Peach glanced back, "You can't go like _that_." Oh. _Oh_, no, this wouldn't do at all. She wouldn't feel very authoritative dressed in…nothing but a towel. And she couldn't stand the thought of allowing Bowser to see her in such a way.

"Quickly, then." She rushed to her closet, revealing dozens of pink dresses, corsets, and shoes, her athletic wear tucked away in drawers. She reached for one of her day gowns and, with Toadette's help, changed hurriedly. She pulled on white satin gloves, for modesty's sake, but her hair? She pinned it, still wet, into a tousled bun with only her crown to complement it. "You should stay here."

Peach had assumed it went without saying that Toadette was safest hidden. But the way the toadstool girl's expression darkened, the princess had second thoughts. "No way!" she protested, her chin jutting out assertively from her round face, "Your Highness." She tacked on the title apologetically, and explained herself, "If…_you_," and Toadette shot a furtive look once more to Mario's picture, "can be brave, so can I!" And besides, she didn't want to be left here alone – not with Koopa Troopas just outside the door. It must've been the determination she saw in her attendant's face, because Peach's own softened. It might also have been that the princess was afraid, and _she _didn't want to traipse about alone either.

She steeled herself for the worst as she cracked her bedroom door, peering out into a sliver of hallway – expecting to see her guards patrolling. But there was no one. She opened the door wider, stuck her head out of her room, and found that she was alone. There were no Koopa Troopas here. Hm.

"Let's go," Peach suggested softly, slipping out into the hallway with Toadette on her heels – and she'd foolishly dared to think they might actually reach the cellar without any trouble at all.

"Eeeeek!" No such luck.

Toadette _shrieked _piercingly and Peach, in turn, jumped with a yelp all her own – as the two Boos from the Clown Car appeared suddenly and with pitchy laughter gave their most gruesome smiles, tongues lolling out between sharp teeth. Toadette had buried her face in her hands, and so the ghosts were emboldened to cause even _more _of a racket, something that Peach had to put a stop to. If they didn't quiet down, she was sure that koopas would come running in no time! And then how would she be able to help the other prisoners?

"_Stop!_" Three faces turned to hers – and all three were speechless, arms at their sides – at Peach's order, although it was given in a series of high sounds that resembled an eerie giggling, or strange vibrato. It didn't sound quite right coming from a human, and the princess knew that her accent was probably atrocious, but she was hardly fluent in Booish. Her knowledge of it was quite elementary (her Yoshi was better, although she still struggled with the tones and punctuation), but she knew enough to capture their attention.

"Now listen here," she continued in her own voice, because while she was not well-versed in their language, she knew that the Boos understood _her_ as easily as their king did. "You can either tag along, or you can run off to Bowser, but you will _behave_. This is still my castle, and I am free to go wherever I want. Do you understand?" Without a word, the now reprimanded Boos covered their eyes shyly and disappeared. Frankly, Peach couldn't care less _where _they went off to – and once Toadette offered her a very brave (if watery) smile, the two continued on their stealthy rescue mission to the cellar, avoiding two Koopa Troopas along the way but otherwise uninterrupted.

"Halt!" Until now.

Peach knew the 'dungeon' would be guarded, so the two Koopatrols were not a…surprise, though the spiked helmets and shining armor _were _rather intimidating (especially by torchlight, as there were no windows in the lower levels of Mushroom Castle – for obvious reasons). She heard Toadette gasp fearfully and held out a hand, indicating that she wanted the toadstool girl to stay behind. Peach thought this could be handled diplomatically, so she bravely stepped closer – and while two sets of eyes widened with a mumbled acknowledgment, "Princess," neither Koopatrol moved aside.

"Your Highness, that's close enough," the right one warned her, shifting from one foot to the other, armor jangling as he did.  
>"Yeah, you're not s'posed to be down here." This, from the one on the left.<p>

_No one_, she thought to herself, _is 'supposed' to be down here._ "I'd like to negotiate the release of my people," she said carefully, "You've got no right to hold them as prisoners. They've done nothing wrong."

The two Koopatrols exchanged a look, before the one on the right spoke again. "Sorry, Princess, but we don't have the authority to negotiate hostage situations. You've got to take that up with His Nastiness, King Bowser."

"Why? Are we under attack?" By 'we', she meant her kingdom. Her home was occupied, yes, but she still didn't know _why_. Was this an act of war? If it was, why would he bother with the magical shield in the first place? Why not imprison her with the others? "What _exactly _does…'His Nastiness'…want with Mushroom Castle?"

Another incomprehensible glance was shared, then- "We're not at liberty to discuss that, Your Highness." Pause. "Sorry."

Peach was exasperated, but she decided on a different tactic. "Can I at least _see _them?" she asked, her voice much warmer, softer, so that her request might seem trivial, inconsequential, "I know you're just doing your jobs, but I'd only need a couple minutes. Please, I've been gone for weeks, I just want to say hello." Surely it would be all she was _capable _of doing with such high-ranking guards to keep a close eye on her. "It would mean the world to me."

The two Koopatrols were torn between their orders (to guard the prisoners) and…well, their _orders_. It was well understood that should anyone raise a hand to the princess (metaphorically or literally), he or she might as well throw themselves in a pit of lava – because that'd be preferable to what His Majesty would do. In the end, it seemed like a harmless request – so the pair nodded to Peach with a firm reminder, "One minute." This was to reassert what authority they _did _have over the prisoners, and the princess quietly said she understood (and thanked them).

She expected the worst, breath caught in her throat as one guard opened the thick, wooden door to the cellar – but as soon as she stepped over the threshold, she was greeted by several dozen gasps of, "Your Highness!" "Princess Peach!" "It's the princess!" In this dark, cold, and damp room – that smelled faintly of mildew, and was bereft of all but empty wine racks – huddled together at least two dozen Mushrooms, all familiar faces from every corner of the castle.

"I'm so sorry!" she exclaimed, searching out the faces of the advisors, two of which had been trapped here with the rest. "I had no idea…" There were those who sought to reassure her – that she could not have known, that it was an ambush, and no one held her responsible, but Peach scarcely heard the words. Without Toadsworth, all decisions fell to her – and she knew she couldn't allow the Mushrooms to stay here in these…inhumane conditions. "Don't worry," she said, without having the slightest idea how to go about fulfilling the promise, "I'll take care of this."

"PRINCESS!" Toadette.

That wasn't the only thing she heard – as one of the Koopatrols stuck his head in with a hissed, "Your Highness- please!"

"_Where is she?_" Bowser. If she didn't feel the way (was she imagining this?) the walls and floor quaked with every approaching stomp, she should've understood why Toadette willingly scampered _into _the cellar-turned-prison, or why the brave Koopatrol's voice cracked on the end of his plea to her. Peach didn't want him to get in trouble, really; she didn't _blame _the guards themselves, she knew what a terrible bully Bowser could be – especially to his own people. So she stepped out of the cellar, between the two Koopatrols, just in time to quiver in the presence of the Koopa King. He seemed immeasurably large here – the ceilings were lower, the hallways narrower, and Bowser was so tall, so broad. She wouldn't have been surprised if the spikes on his shell scraped the passageway. It was equally possible that his anger made him all the more massive – especially when he glared at them (her included, she felt) with garnet eyes.

"I thought I told you _fools _she didn't belong down here!" 'She' was standing right there – and nearly winced at how loudly his growl echoed.

"Sire, we-"

"It's not their fault," Peach protested, interrupting the Koopatrol before the impatient (and unforgiving) Bowser could. She felt the Toads behind her as if their eyes, their fear and discomfort, pushed her forward. Without her stewards, her best advisors, she was - for the first time - making her own decisions. And she recognized these decisions would have consequences for someone other than herself. "I- I had to see it for myself." The imprisonment of her protectors, servants, and friends. "Please let them go." It was one thing to kidnap her, quite another to hurt so many in the pursuit of whatever _ridiculous _power he was after now.

Bowser outwardly scoffed. "So one of 'em can rat me out to the Stupid Brothers? You think I'm an idiot?"

"_No_," she said, too flustered to see the expression that flickered across his face. She only cared about one thing. "You said it yourself, Bowser, no one can breach the spell you've casted. You don't really _need _to keep prisoners down here, do you? They're not a threat to you." He snorted contemptuously at the thought – hah! A mushroom, threaten him? That wasn't even funny, it was just…

"Pitiful."

Peach frowned, balling her gloved hands into small fists at her sides. The politeness was more than forced when she persisted, "Will you let them go?" To move freely about the castle? It was a small comfort, but important.

Bowser eyed her in what was, for him, a calculating manner. "Why?"

Why. He had to ask her _why _he shouldn't imprison innocent people. _He is a monster._ A part of her suspected that he was only taunting her, although she couldn't see proof of it in his face. "Bowser, please." He could not know what it took for her to utter that word to him – repeatedly – and what it meant. "Don't be cruel." There was a mild reproach in the words, and the way she looked at him made Bowser uncomfortable.

It reminded him of why he'd gotten rid of her in the first place – he couldn't concentrate on his dastardly plans with Peach right there, with that voice and those eyes, making him feel like a jerk. "I _am _cruel," he reminded her - boastfully, "And don't you forget it, Princess."

_How could I? There's not a decent bone in your body! _"You know what I mean." Unnecessarily cruel. Cruel when it served no purpose. Cruel for cruelty's sake.

Silence. The princess began to think he would refuse - just because he could, which was why she didn't expect it when he grunted out, "Fine." Peach's eyes widened in surprise – and hers weren't the only, but the Koopatrols knew better than to question His Majesty. "If you have dinner with me." Blackmail. Now _that _was characteristic of their king – as much as destruction and the sheer terror he inspired were. "If you don't…" he trailed off with a knowing smirk.

What other answer could she possibly give? Peach nodded reluctantly, but she wasn't finished making demands just yet. "Promise me your guards won't harm them." This was very much a request that relied on his word, and on the respect _his _people had for it. She – as did everyone in this cellar – knew very well that Mushrooms were not a match for well-trained Koopa Troopas. Her kingdom was peaceful, with little military strength, why else would he need to convert a cellar into a dungeon?

"Agreed." It was no scale off his back, he didn't give a damn about her minions – the only thing he cared about was standing right in front of him. She was the answer to all the power he could ever want (at least, for now).

"Agreed," she echoed quietly – and with that, the deal was sealed. Bowser ordered his Koopatrols to spread the news not to pick fights with the natives, while the Mushrooms filed out of the cellar, several stopping to clasp her hands or dress in shaking gratitude (for Bowser was still present, and they were rightfully afraid of him). Peach encouraged Toadette to leave with the others, citing that she'd been very brave, and did not dare to whisper anything more – for fear that the Koopa King would overhear. She was among the last to leave, until only the princess and Bowser remained in the bowels of the castle. The torchlight had dwindled down, and with her back to the frigid cellar, her hair still damp, Peach was freezing. Were it not for the gloves, her goosebumps would have been obvious, raised along her skin.

And Bowser just stared at her in the flickering darkness, which only made her shivering worse – until she'd gone so far as to wrap her arms around herself, hands rubbing along the few inches of exposed skin between gloves and sleeves.

"You're cold." Peach didn't say anything, but she didn't have to – a moment later, and Bowser took it on himself to exhale a breath of fire, scouring the walls and reigniting what torches had begun to fade. Even to stand so close to flames – it made all the difference, and the heat lingered afterwards.

"Um," she didn't know what to say, "Thank you." And not for the warmth. Peach supposed she should've said it sooner, but…well, surely _Bowser _of all people would forgive her a slip in courtesy. "I'll return to my room now." She started to leave.

"Princess!" Bowser knew that he wanted her company, but he still didn't have an excuse when she walked past him. It'd taken him a few steps to say anything at all – he admired her walk away from him, the back of her neck, which for some reason transfixed him because he had never seen it before. She looked beautiful with her hair up. She'd never worn it up for him before (or with _him _in the vicinity, really, since she didn't do things for him...on purpose, anyway). He would've let her Toads free just 'cause she asked, and 'cause he wanted to please her – but it was better if he got something out of it too. She'd never willingly eat with him.

She wouldn't let him touch her either, which was why he'd had no choice but to blow fire in the hopes of heating her up, if only temporarily. Putting his arms around her was not an option, not if he didn't want her to scream.

Peach turned to him at the address, her pretty face perfectly blank, reserved.

"Give me a tour of the castle." It was meant to be a request, but it came out as a command. Habit, he guessed.

He wished she wouldn't look at him like that. He could practically taste the mistrust - and yeah, he hadn't done much to _warrant _trust, but c'mon...

"Why would _you_ need a tour?" _It hasn't changed since the last time you came here looking for trouble. _

"It's been awhile, alright? And I got a lotta castles." What, did she expect him to have all the floorplans memorized? Nevermind that he knew _this _castle backwards and forwards for more than just strategy, _she _didn't have to know that as long as she didn't lock herself up again.

"Alright." She agreed. Not happily, but who cared? One step at a time.


	6. Potential Emissions Fault

**A/N:** Wow, it was so cool to wake up today and see three more reviews for last chapter! Thanks a million to **Reyairia **and **AlterJericho** for your awesome reviews - and your compliments on characterization, because that's the most nerve-wracking part of fanfiction. It means the world to me that you guys think I am doing a satisfactory job (P.S. I love King Boo too - I think he's adorable, lol). Also thanks to **dragon19kyoshi **for the review!

This chapter is pretty short - but it is Bowser/Peach centric and where I cut it short was a good 'stopping' point, I guess. I have the next chapter over halfway written, so expect to see Chapter 7 up later tonight or early tomorrow.

**EDIT: **Also, Ch. 9-10+ will have a little more Mario Kart-relatedness in it, if you've been missing it (if not, no worries because the chapters won't be entirely focused on that!).

Thanks again for the reviews, I hope that this chapter is okay (I'm a little nervous about it!). Please leave me a note if you have the time! :)

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><p>Peach wished more than anything there was a way for her to contact Mario. She wondered where he was, whether or not he was safe - and Daisy, too, Luigi, Toad. She also knew that Bowser could very well have imprisoned her (and the rest of the castle's inhabitants) in the squalor of the cellar; she could not afford to upset him any more than was necessary. Even if he did not punish her directly, the Mushrooms whose safety she had bargained (was that the right word?) for meant nothing to him. Peach knew that she needed to protect those in her care, and this meant indulging Bowser - as much as she could stand to, anyway. She could think of no alternative as she escorted him into the Main Hall.<p>

She was so nervous. "What would you like to see first?"

Good question. Bowser couldn't care less about a castle tour - he'd always figured that once he took over, he'd bulldoze this place anyway, build something more his style. "Your defenses." Who said he didn't have a sense of humor? What a joke.

Peach didn't think it was funny, in part because his 'suggestion' sounded so...hostile. There were beautiful things to be seen in the castle, but she supposed Bowser couldn't appreciate that. He'd changed everything when he'd taken the Power Stars - emptied her home of its inviting warmth and replaced it with awful paintings in empty rooms. The only things he left were portraits of her, but he'd even tampered with some of those. No, she shouldn't have been surprised that he only cared for her castle's more _destructive _elements.

"I believe you've met my guards," she said, subdued so she would not disrespect him through tone alone. When Bowser ordered his Koopa Troopas to round up every Mushroom in the castle, those assigned to patrol the halls and grounds were among them.

"Yeah?" Bowser had never looked at the stumpy fungi that way - and for good reason. His laughter was low, graveled, and derisive, "Looked more like target practice to me." They barely came up to his knees - less like target practice, more like bouncing, screaming soccer balls just ripe for the stomping.

"They're not." She couldn't bear to make eye contact with him, for fear that her anger would show. She changed the subject. "Shall we tour the grounds first?"

"Why?" Bowser was instantly suspicious. Maybe she still hoped she could escape from him, maybe she thought there was a way to get a message out to Mario - and maybe he was _paranoid _because he had never once been successful in keeping that mustached butterball from blundering in (no matter how extensive his precautions and traps).

But Peach had no such schemes down her gloves. She couldn't try to reach Mario unless she knew she had a chance - because if Bowser caught her, he would never give her an opportunity to try again. She could not risk her people for anything less.

_Is he really going to question my every word? _"We have no armory, no dungeon - as you know - no defenses inside the castle." Apart from her guards, who had been easily subdued. To anyone else, she would've been proud to say: 'look at my kingdom, we have no need of political prisons or stores of weapons or horrid traps to ensnare the unwary, we are peaceful.' But to Bowser? It made her feel foolish. Was it any wonder that he so easily abducted her time and time again, if she made no effort to fortify her castle? On the other hand, would doing so only provoke the Koopa King more?

He did not see the Mushroom Kingdom as a challenge. It was, perhaps, the only reason he had not yet razed it to the ground with his army.

"You're just asking for it, huh?" Those were Bowser's first words - the contemptuous sounds he'd made in response to Peach needed no explanation - as they stepped out into the fading sunlight of late afternoon.

"Excuse me?"

Bowser stepped in front of her, catching that blue gaze for the first time - really - since the race. Was she deliberately playing dumb? He knew she was a princess, but she had to know something about combat tactics. "Invasion. C'mon, Princess, you got no spikes, no thwomps, no fireballs, no traps, no curses, no army, no counterattack - _at all_ - and no natural defenses except this _puddle _you call a moat." He leaned against the ledge of the bridge just long enough to glance at the water. It didn't even look that deep. Might as well call it an outdoor swimming pool. "I could conquer your kingdom with one claw in one hour, you know that?" And he'd still have time leftover to get some kebabs.

Peach stared at him with those big eyes (every time she did, it felt like a spiny shell to the gut), and he figured it was just 'cause she didn't have any real military men around. Was this the first time anybody ever sat her down and showed her everything he could do to fix this kingdom? How easy it'd be to wipe out if he felt like it? "You oughta fill this thing with lava." A jerk of his horns down at the moat. "And get some real guards. Ones that aren't so short. And fleshy."

Didn't she get it? Bowser brought the koopapower, the magic, the genius - he turned it into a fortress. The things he could do to this worthless lump of stones - she had no idea. "Princess, this castle's only safe when I'm here."

Peach stood there and she listened to his insults, his self-importance, his _nerve _to claim what he did. The Koopa King was heavy but muscular, aggression in a shell from the razor-sharp tips of his claws, to the thick spikes on his carapace and tail, the angry curve of pointed horns. How could she see him as anything but devastating? There was nothing 'safe' about him, and she was furious that he would claim otherwise.

"This castle," she said, her voice nearly trembling, "is only under attack when you're here. _You _are the worst threat we've ever had!"

The princess lost her temper - but instead of goading the Koopa King, as she feared she might, he seemed perfectly aware of the danger he posed. "Yeah, that's what I'm _saying_," he agreed, bemused at her accusations and all the more swaggering because of them, "Nobody's gonna try to cross _me_. They don't mess with you because they know I'm the biggest, baddest thing around." And the Mushroom Kingdom was his - unofficially. He'd invaded it the most already. Anyone who tried to take it from him? Had to be a moron.

"That doesn't even make sense," Peach argued, frustrated with his twisted logic, "_You_- ooh, Bowser Koopa! _You_ are a menace!" She turned abruptly on her heel, so angry she could scarcely find the words between clenched teeth (and that was hardly a regal reaction). She just had to get _away _from him, but she could not even storm off properly - such was the effect he had on her. She could no longer ignore him.

"And another thing!" Peach stopped just short of stepping off the bridge, onto the ground - and spun around to glare at Bowser, "Do you know what makes me feel _safe_? It isn't lava, or trapdoors or spiked shells," and it certainly wasn't _him_, "Mario. _Mario_ makes me feel safe - and he doesn't need those things!" Why? Because her hero didn't go looking for violence, or perpetrating it through attacks on _peaceful _kingdoms. He fought fairly and from the heart, and it was what she most admired about him.

Unfortunately, there was nothing that riled Bowser up so much as mention of that chubby, hairy Italian loser. He _hated _that guy. And Peach had all but said that Mario was the better man _to his face! _By the time she'd said his name a second time, Bowser's mood had more than soured. The Koopa King barreled after her at an astonishing speed - considering his size - with a bellowed, "HE CAN'T _AFFORD _THOSE THINGS! DO YOU KNOW WHY?" Peach didn't answer, terror robbing her of her well-deserved anger. She ran off the bridge as it trembled violently under her feet - she thought he would destroy it by his stomps alone! - but she wasn't fast enough. Bowser's strides were much longer than hers, and he grabbed her by the shoulders - forcibly twisting her around with a grip so hard that she was sure he'd torn holes in the fabric of her sleeves, perhaps even pierced skin.

"Do you know _why_?" he repeated in a ferocious growl, thick with rage. He'd backed her up against the short, picket fencing that ran along the edge of the moat, preventing any pedestrians (particularly curious children!) from slipping into the water below. She felt the wood press against her legs through her gown, and she shook so hard, her teeth rattled. She feared that - had she not pinned it to her hair - her crown would've toppled off her head. "BECAUSE HE'S A PLUMBER!" Bowser released her with a shove, slinging his massive skull to the side with a _roar _of smoldering flames so close to her, the fencing caught fire.

That wasn't the worst of it - because the Koopa King's push, combined with her already unsteady footing, sent the princess careening _over _the fence. She screamed in free fall as she tumbled down into the stone ditch - cut off only when she _smashed _into the water with a very loud splash.

It was that splash that caught Bowser's attention - though he almost mistook it for the blood rushing through his ears. He leaned over the fencing, glaring down into the deeply carved, broad moat to see nothing but white froth and agitated ripples where Peach must have landed. It would serve her right if she _did _drown, he huffed to himself, his nostrils flaring with his still seething mood. Maybe she ought to call _Mario _to save her.

But of course, there _was _no Mario here - he knew that. So with a wrathful snarl that shook his entire frame, Bowser jumped into the water after the princess. _She owes me big for this_.


	7. In Need of Airbags

**A/N:** Hey all! I edited my previous A/N to account for the fact that this is taking a big longer than I thought, so! Expect to see Mario Kart-ness for sure, chapter after next. It may come earlier, depending on how dinner goes. My eternal, eternal thanks :) to reviewers **dragon19kyoshi **and **Ikuni Hattori**. You're both amazing, and I totally appreciate it! If I had some extra mushrooms (of the healthy variety!), I'd send them to you!

As usual, I own neither the characters nor the backdrop. I'm loosely basing the shape of the moat on Super Mario 64, if you're curious, but since the castle's plans vary depending on what game you play, it's not an exact match-up. Thanks, Nintendo!

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><p>It hurt.<p>

The moment she hit the surface, Peach let out a gasp and unwittingly swallowed a mouthful of water as she sank beneath it. Pain radiated through her back, knocking the air out of her lungs, and she floundered - unable to see, and thoroughly weighed down by the layers of her gown which swelled up underwater to block her view. She'd only just emerged, thrashing and gasping and spluttering in the air when a _tidal wave _mere inches away instantly forced her under again - the second time Peach surfaced, she coughed and choked up what felt like _liters_ poured down her throat. She didn't even have enough breath to scream when Bowser surged out of the water - the source of the wave that nearly drowned her - mane, scales, and snout dripping wet. All she could do was tread water and stare at the Koopa King, the stinging pain giving way to cold temperatures and _common sense_.

Toadsworth would have been so disappointed in her, she realized.

How could she have said those things? She knew it would make him angry, although she could hardly have expected _this_. She should never have mentioned Mario; nothing good could ever come out of encouraging their rivalry (even if unintentionally). Such a failure as this on her part - so soon after negotiating the safety of the castle-bound Mushrooms - made her wonder if she deserved her peoples' trust. She had never lost her temper so vocally before, and to do so with Bowser was very unwise.

He started towards her suddenly - and Peach gracelessly backpedaled underwater, creating a lot of panicky splashing in a small amount of distance. Still disoriented, Peach was at even more of a disadvantage as she tried to swim away from him, her head barely bobbing above the water. "Bowser, please," the fear stifled her words, "I didn't...I didn't mean- Bowser!" The Koopa King scooped an arm around her waist - and pulled her back against his chest - as he'd done on the race track.

Peach gave one frantic kick - and that was it, after she felt the warning growl reverberate through his chest - and clutched his forearm with both hands as Bowser somehow managed to hold her _and _stay afloat. "Don't lie to me," he said threateningly, and she was glad that she couldn't see his face, "You meant every word, Princess, but that's alright." Silence. "Are you okay?"

After a hesitant pause, she nodded.

"Good." The princess didn't know what to say to that, so she tilted her head back slightly so as to better keep it above water_. _That was when she realized it - her crown was gone. No amount of pins could've withstood her fall and Peach lifted her hands out of the water with a start, nearly hitting Bowser in the chin with her elbow as she smoothed her fingers through her hair with growing dread.

"Bowser, wait!" This time, she didn't fight to twist away from him - but towards him, so close that her nose nearly brushed his skin. She would've flushed were she not so worried about- "My crown! It must have fallen off- please! Let me get it!" It was a precious family treasure, representative of not only her power, but that of her entire kingdom. She couldn't wait until the moat was drained - she wanted it back. Right now.

"No."

"But I need it!"

"_No._" Why was he doing this? To punish her?

"I-"

"_I'll _get it. Stay here." Without so much as a glance her way, the aggravated Koopa King released her and - with a deep, shuddering intake of breath - he dove beneath the water. As soon as the tip of his tail disappeared, the surface grew still and tranquil once more. Peach could see the shadow of his powerful movements beneath the water - and she realized that she had a chance, now, to try to escape. To swim away from him. It would've been risky, but far less dangerous than allowing him so close. She considered it - but almost immediately dismissed the idea. Even if she made it to dry land without him, where would she go? Bowser would find his way out eventually - and he would be even angrier.

And truthfully, she did want her crown back.

While Peach weighed the benefits of doing as she was told, Bowser cut through the water with ease. He didn't particularly like swimming, especially not when he was stuck searching a stone floor for a speck of gold. So why didn't he make the princess do it herself? Oh, he was still ticked off at her - and it was half her fault anyway, that he got so angry - but the guilt was almost as bad. He never wanted to hurt Peach. He'd wanted her out of the way - the first time he kidnapped her - for her land and her resources, but he didn't intend to kill her. At first, she had been a means to an end - marriage to her would solidify his claim to Mushroom Kingdom - but she was also very beautiful, even at her most distressed (which was, coincidentally, the state he often found her in during his abductions). She would be more than a political maneuver, she would be his trophy, his prize.

But now he didn't just want her. He wanted her to want him, too.

Despite tumultuous relations with his kingdom, the princess never banned him from the competitions and races held in her lands. She never passed a single edict against any koopa, nor did she ever attempt to retaliate. He was fascinated by her because he could not understand her. And he was frustrated by her because she could not understand him.

Frustrated enough to frighten her off a ledge?  
>Bowser wasn't proud of that.<p>

He figured retrieving the crown was a way to make amends without _making amends _- and it was easy to see where the delicate headpiece had sunk, not far from where she'd fallen. With it in his claws, he pushed off from the moat floor to surface, turning towards the spot where he'd left her. He half-expected her to have fled, but she wasn't. The anxiety in her eyes only grew more pronounced - and Bowser was seized by the urge to ease it, so he raised one arm above the water, revealing the crown in his grasp. When she smiled in relief, however timidly, he felt a knot in his throat - like he'd swallowed a Yoshi egg or something. Sure, she wasn't smiling _at him_, more at the safe return of her accessory, but Bowser would take what he could get, considering.

She didn't fling water at him and attempt to escape as he drew closer, so he took advantage of this rare opportunity. He lifted the crown in both hands, having reached the princess, and he placed it back on her head, claws brushing against wet hair briefly. If she flinched, he didn't notice.

"Thank you." Her voice was slightly hoarse, but Bowser thought it made her seem more human. In her case, he didn't mind. He would've told her that, but she'd already begun to shrink away from him, out of his grasp. It didn't matter. He knew how to get out of this. Past the smaller, wooden bridge on the left, the water grew shallow. Two minute swim, tops.

"Hold onto my shell," he 'suggested', with a nod in that direction, "I'll pull you." She looked like she might say no, and took a long time to respond - like she did on the race track - but it was different this time. He really wasn't planning anything. She seemed to figure that out too, because she acquiesced by tentatively and uncomfortably wading closer.

"Just...anywhere?" The spikes looked especially vicious - and sharp - from this proximity, and Peach wasn't sure she wanted to touch them (in fact, she knew she didn't).

Bowser glanced over his shoulder at her. "Be careful." It was out of his mouth before he could stop himself, and the Koopa King jerked his eyes away from her face, so she wouldn't see his embarrassment. "You ready yet?" His impatience served to cover up...whatever _that _was, and the princess whispered that she was. She clung to the spines as best she could without prickling herself, and Bowser - despite his tone - moved slowly and methodically, careful not to bump her up against the shell too hard. Although he couldn't feel the squeeze of her fingers, her hands, he was still pleased with himself and only vaguely regretted how short the swim was before his claws scraped ground and she let go. Solid ground again.

_He _shifted in his shell, emptying residual water out of it, while the bedraggled Peach tripped over her sopping dress repeatedly, feet slipping in pink heels, and pulled off her gloves. The wet way the satin clung to her fingers, it felt almost _slimy _- and she wrung them out, then pulled the pins out of her bun. She tilted her head, gathering all of her hair over one shoulder to squeeze the water out of it - and then she saw the picket fence.

"Oh my Stars!" The fire had spread along the entire fence, it was almost completely engulfed - and Peach wasn't the only one who saw it. Without a second thought, she grasped her waterlogged gown and ran towards the flames. "Help me!" she insisted in a cry to the trio of Koopatrol guards who'd heard the commotion (but wisely decided not to interfere), and she only realized once she'd reached the smoldering wood that she didn't _have _any water. Not at her fingertips. She started to gather up the dripping hem of her gown when-

"You heard her, you idiots! _Now!_"

"Yessir!"  
>"Yessir!"<br>"At once, Your Greatness!"

The koopas - who'd stiffened at the sound of His Majesty's voice - instantly jumped into action apologetically. They sprinted off towards the nearest water source, while Bowser growled to Peach, "Move." She turned to glare at him, fingers wrapped up in the silk of her gown - but was stunned to see that the Koopa King had pulled off his shell and hoisted it now on one shoulder. She had never seen this before - and so stepped aside slowly, barely missing the splash as he tipped several gallons of water over most of the fencing. The flames were almost extinguished by the time the Koopatrols returned with helmet-fulls of water. It looked awful, light brown wood turned charred, black, and splintered - and most of it had collapsed into ugly piles of ash under the weight of Bowser's overturned shell - with only a few slivers of picket left untouched.

The Koopa King was already shouting commands to have it replaced, but Peach couldn't look away from it. The fire hadn't been dangerous, not really, and it hadn't damaged anything..._important_, but for the silliest reason, it just made tears well up in her eyes, a hand over her mouth. Her gown was completely saturated, heavy and clinging to her body in all the wrong places, her shoes were squelching uncomfortably, her hair...just...disastrous, and_..._and this was _Bowser's _doing. He pushed her into the moat - he ruined her clothes _again. _And he could've done much worse.

"Peach." She hadn't noticed he'd pulled his shell back on, but he was impossible to ignore as he stood in front of her view. "I'm gonna get that fence fixed, alright? Good as new. Better." He still wouldn't apologize.

"That should be fine," she replied faintly, although she didn't mean anything of the sort.

And even _Bowser _picked up on that, and the silence which stretched between them until he added, "I didn't- uh- I mean- I never would've burned you." A full minute passed before Peach spoke again - and when she did, it had nothing to do with the fire.

"We also have Chain Chomps," she said, meeting his eyes with fragile poise, "Behind the castle." As if this were an unfinished conversation, an explanation of the tour cut drastically short. "But I don't like to encourage their aggressiveness." Chain Chomps were very difficult to train (if not impossible) - and fickle with their loyalty. It was necessary to approach them with extreme caution.

"Peach..." Bowser was confused, and it showed in his voice. _I don't get it_.

"I'm going to change for dinner." She changed the subject - again. "I will arrange it with the kitchen staff." _Without you_. Leaving her gloves behind (for the second time today), Peach returned to the castle with as much dignity as she could muster. She wanted nothing more than to lock herself in her bedroom and never come out.

And Bowser?  
>He watched her go with a roll of his eyes. <em>Who the hell said anything about Chain Chomps?<em>


	8. Decals and Refueling

**A/N:** Whoa, you guys are _so cool_. I had my biggest number of reviews yet (hurray!) - so I have to give huge, huge thanks to **Ikuni Hattori,** **dragon19kyoshi****, ****StoryMaster64, **and **DaLover**. I appreciate you so much, especially for taking the time to review - it is really, really inspiring. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!

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><p>Having sent for Toadette to convey the dinner request to the kitchen (as the princess was in no condition to wander the halls in her clothes), Peach found herself well and truly alone in her bedroom. She wrapped herself in a comfy robe, leaving the gown and shoes to dry on the balcony, and lay down on her side. Her shoulders were bruised, and her head ached. It seemed like another life - to think she'd woken so early this morning in Bowser's lands to prepare for her race. She was so thoroughly exhausted, and sore all over, that all she wanted to do was curl up and sleep. But she couldn't. It occurred to her, safe and warm and <em>alone<em>, that Bowser hadn't fallen in the moat. He must've jumped, and she didn't understand why. Why fetch her crown? Why help her wade through the water? Why put out the fire _he_ caused? She didn't even know he _could _swim, and he looked so strange without his shell. Did he often remove it? Was that an improper question to dwell upon? She didn't know what the physiological standards of modesty were with...koopas, and oh, come to think of it, she didn't _really _want to think on that at all.

There were plenty of other things to consider. Her confusion aside, not only had she failed to give a proper tour - but she'd also failed in learning anything of use about his spells and schemes. As she dried and styled her hair with nimble fingers, Peach gave herself a very good talking to. Dinner would be better. She would find out everything she needed to know to contact Mario, and to rid her castle of Bowser's presence.

She couldn't believe he threw her (yes, retrospectively, now she was seeing it that way) in the water.

How fortunate was she that the moat was _not_, in fact, filled with lava, or any manner of hungry beasts. He really was the most awful creature she'd ever encountered.

"Princess?" And he was outside her room. She heard his voice in tandem with an obnoxiously loud _thunk _of his closed fist against her door. Peach smoothed down her full-bodied evening gown with pink satin gloves, sliding on shoes with pink topaz set in the design. They were lovely, and she always felt wonderful when she wore them. She'd chosen to dress up in this way not for Bowser but for herself - today had been one discomforting experience after another, and she'd certainly looked her _worst. _By dressing up, she reminded herself of how confident and competent she could be, that she was fully capable of turning these mistakes around for the greater good. Pretty shoes really did have a power all their own.

But was it enough power to face what was on the other side of that wall? Peach didn't really have a choice, so she opened the door mid-knock as he grew impatient, waiting for her. "Hello, Bowser."

She didn't know why he seemed so surprised - did he not think she was in her room? What _she _didn't expect was to see her white gloves in his still-clenched fist, half-raised to bang on the door. She'd almost forgotten she'd left them outside, but she wasn't sure how she felt about _Bowser _being the one to bring them back.

"You look...great." Peach broke eye contact, uncomfortable with how intently he looked at her when he said that - were it anyone else, she might have been pleased, but it was Bowser. And since he'd already told her this - when she was in a bike suit, covered in blooper ink - she wasn't sure she could trust his judgment on what looked 'great'. Not that she trusted his judgment. Or him. At all.

Peach didn't want to thank him for the compliment - she didn't _want _a compliment from him at all, so instead she asked about the gloves, "Are those mine?"

"Oh! Yeah, I...yeah, they were outside. Here." _Smooth. _Bowser felt the brush of her fingertips against his scales as he released a slow, heavy breath. He was hungry, he'd been waiting to eat for what felt like days - it put him in a bad mood, especially when Old Hagface wouldn't get off his case about trying to drown the princess, _which he hadn't_, alright, she just _slipped _- and now he felt like he'd starve for a week just to look at her.

Well, maybe not a _week_...but she looked really good.

Bowser followed her into her bedroom.

Not for _that _reason...though it wasn't like he hadn't thought about it - but he figured he wasn't likely to get a chance to see it again anytime soon. The Koopa King didn't always take her from the balcony, but when he did, usually he was more interested in getting her out of the castle as quickly as possible. He didn't exactly stick around for decorating tips. Now he had the chance to get a good look around - there was a lot of pink. No surprise. He would've thought, hey, it was perfect for her - if not for the glaring _mistake _on her wall. The only non-pink thing in the whole damn room - and what was it? _Mario_.

"You got a _picture _of him in your _bedroom?_"

"Bowser!"

He promised himself he wouldn't yell at her again, but- "This is the stupidest thing I've ever seen!" Ignoring the princess' indignation at the intrusion, Bowser stepped up close to the painting with a disgusted grimace on his face. Whose bright idea was it to immortalize that ugly plumber in a _portrait? _The artist probably went blind just looking at him - and what was with the idiotic stance? And his face?

"Get out! Don't you have _any _manners at all?"

"Are you _serious _about this?" Bowser turned on her with a glower that was half anger, and half revulsion. Peach only blushed - hard - and yeah, rightfully so. She should've been more than embarrassed. "It doesn't even _go _with anything else in the room!"

Bowser, King of the Koopas _and _excellent judge of style in his spare time. Was there anything he couldn't do?

According to Peach? Plenty. "Stop it!"

He was not listening. If she wanted a portrait of a real hero, he could've gotten her one. He could've gotten her a statue - ten statues! "I oughta do you a favor and _scorch _this piece of crap!" He couldn't stand it, the thought of anything even remotely connected to _Mario _being in her bedroom. Or anywhere near her. That fat oaf didn't deserve to be on her wall - unless he was getting _stomped _into it by Bowser.

"Don't you dare, Bowser Koopa!" Peach had it commissioned herself - and Mario had been very humbled by it, he'd turned red in the most endearing way from the tips of his ears to his cheeks.

Now Bowser didn't get why _she _was all worked up over it - he was doing a good thing, really upping the market value of this place by getting rid of bad 'art'. "Why not, huh? It's not like he's some big movie star!" Or athlete, or _king_. He was just some loser who fixed toilets for a living, and occasionally stuck his big nose where it didn't belong. "Doesn't it give you nightmares?"

Bowser had no sense of personal space, or of common _courtesy _to other people. A lady's bedroom was private - and had Peach known that she needed to close and lock her door for the couple minutes it would take her to lay the gloves out on the balcony, gather her courage, she would have. She just _assumed _that Bowser wasn't so- when he shouted, it scared her. She was torn between fear of him and impatience _with _him. He made it so difficult for her to pretend to be cordial, especially when he insulted the man who'd saved her so many times before.

"The only thing," Peach replied crossly, "that gives me nightmares is _you_." There was only so much that a princess could tolerate in one day.

Bowser wasn't insulted by the retort. In fact, he smirked. And she had no idea why until he drawled, "So...you dream about me?"

The princess flushed an even deeper pink. "You are insufferable." And? "I'm going to dinner." With that, she stormed past him - out of the room. _That wasn't a no_. He wasn't as ticked off any more - and he cast a competitive glare in the portrait's direction. He didn't set it on fire, but he couldn't resist slashing one claw through the belly of the picture, a long, papery tear. Too bad he didn't get to disembowel the real thing (not yet, anyway). Then he turned and followed the princess - before she realized what he'd done. He didn't want to ruin their meal together.

It only took him a few strides to catch up with her, his steps more than thrice her own. She didn't talk to him, but that was hardly out of the ordinary - and Bowser cleared his throat once before prompting, "Peach?"

"Yes?" Peach had fumed long enough - she knew she couldn't let her personal feelings on the matter cloud what she needed to do: convince Bowser to confide in her, to tell her what he wanted. So, like so many princesses before her, she feigned a graciousness she did not feel.

Bowser held open the door to her - for which she thanked him with a slight bob of her head. The informal dining room was better suited to intimate meals between 'friends', and despite their exhaustion, the kitchen staff had performed admirably. The glistening chandelier was lit, casting the entire room with a calm and comforting golden light, while the mahogany wood table had been set with its white lace tablecloth, sterling silver cutlery, and candelabra. There were no Toads in sight, but she knew without a doubt that the food had only just been set out moments ago - her staff was quite talented in the art of subtlety (and it certainly didn't hurt that none of them wished to be in Bowser's presence, and so acted with extraordinary presentiment so that the dinner guests need not ask for anything).

"So, uh," there wasn't a good way to 'ease' her into it, and Bowser gave up trying. "The kids are coming over."

Peach took her seat - which had already been pulled out for her - but faltered slightly. "What?" What kids? _His _kids? "The Koopalings?" All of them? She hadn't seen them since her birthday - and had mixed feelings at the thought of their...'coming over'. Here. To her castle.

"Yeah," he sensed - or heard, since the reluctance was obvious in her voice - that she wasn't exactly happy about it, and considered an apology. For about two seconds. "Didn't want to leave them at home, knowing whose gonna come looking for you." It wasn't that Bowser didn't think his kids could handle the Stupid Brothers, but King Boo was supposed to be on top of it. He wanted the Koopalings with him - and besides, he added awkwardly, "They miss you." Their Mama Peach. "Especially Junior."

Junior. Oh yes, she remembered him. All of them. It wasn't that Peach didn't like them, nor did she blame them for...really, such an unfortunate upbringing. In fact, she was surprised they turned out...so well, having Bowser as their only role model. She'd just never spent very much time with them - and was worried. Not to mention, it probably would've helped her if Mario had managed to find one, assuming the children knew what their father was up to. And she wasn't sure how she felt about Bowser's claim that they "missed" her.

"Oh." What else could she say? "Alright." Peach picked up her knife and fork, but before she could cut into her food-

"_What _isth this?" Bowser. The words came out muffled because he was speaking _around _half his dinner, which he'd shoveled into his mouth in one big bite. Peach looked up to see his movements mirroring hers, though he had some trouble grasping such small silverware between his claws - but he looked less than pleased, cheeks puffed out with a mouthful of _something. _She had to look away, so she didn't have to see chewed bits of shroom as he spoke.

"It's a Dyllis Special," with a few tweaks from her chefs, Peach explained calmly, looking anywhere but at the bad-mannered Koopa across from her, "Roasted shroom and a mango-stuffed hamburger basted in shroom broth on a horsetail salad." It was one of her favorites, and one of the few recipes which included a taste of meat. She was certain the kitchen staff had included that for Bowser's benefit.

"What?" Catching sight of Peach's expression, he forced himself to swallow before saying anything else - but once he had? "You put _fruit_ in your hamburger?" She just nodded. Urgh. That's what he tasted. It was just wrong. You didn't put anything in meat _but meat _- not some super sweet, uh, what'd she call it? Mango? _Mango? _Evil tyrants of his caliber didn't eat _mango_. Or salad. What a pansy dish. "You got any real steak?"

Peach held up a finger as she finished off a much smaller, ladylike bite. She couldn't savor the flavor, because of her company - but it was still delicious. "Mushrooms are our staple crop, Bowser," she reminded him, as if her kingdom's name was not indicative enough, "We have a predominantly vegetarian culinary culture."

"So...no steak?" No wonder everybody was so puny around here, they didn't eat any _protein_.

She gave him a look. "I'll see what I can do." It was the most diplomatic answer. "Don't you like it?"

Not really. Still, he figured it'd be a jerk move to insult the princess' food choices. Bluntly, anyway. "I'll eat it," Bowser hedged dryly. He could eat anything, but he expected a big steak tomorrow to make up for this - and none of that fruity crap either. With that settled (at least to himself), the two ate in silence for a few minutes.

Peach would have liked to complete the whole meal in silence - then she could return to her room - but she didn't have that luxury. She had responsibilities. "Bowser," she said, sipping the tea accompanying her dinner. The cup was dainty and warm in her hands, and the smell reminded her of home.

"Hm?" He was scooping up - in a bothersome way, if you asked her - the last of the salad dressing off his plate in long, squeaky scrapes of his fork tines, but he thankfully paused at the sound of her voice.

"What do you want?" Bowser's fork hit his plate with a clatter, for reasons Peach didn't care to guess, and she elaborated, "Here, in the castle. What are you looking for?" He wouldn't have gone through all this if there weren't a justifiable (in his eyes) reason. If it had just been a routine (was there such a thing?) kidnapping, he probably wouldn't have done it during the Cup. And he certainly wouldn't have brought her back here. "Maybe I can help," she offered, to which Bowser snorted disbelievingly.

"So you can get rid of me faster?"

Peach didn't try to deny it - because she didn't think he would believe her if she had, but she did say _something _to ease the practicality of her offer. Setting down her tea cup, Peach admitted softly, "I really would like to compete on Rainbow Road." If she could not contact Mario, the next best thing would be to give Bowser what he wanted (provided she could) so that he would _leave,_ Stars willing. She suspected the team race would probably be suspended this year because of what _he _had done, but the individual race would be held on Wednesday. That was three days away. The awards ceremony would be on Thursday, and the festivities would last through the weekend - assuming things weren't postponed.

_Not gonna happen, Princess. _He had no intention of letting her go - but he couldn't tell _her _that. She'd run off crying to her room, where she'd swoon over that stupid picture of Mario. That really drove him nuts.

"But you don't have a bike anymore." Crap. Bowser was doing the best he could _not _to remind her what he'd done - that was stupid.

He braced himself for the worst, but Peach merely paused mid-bite to reply, "I always bring a second bike. Toadsworth has my Standard." Toadsworth. If only he were here, she wouldn't feel so unsure of herself. "It would be ideal for the last race, actually. It has much better handling," than the Mach, "which is wonderful on those turns."

"Yeah," Bowser agreed, "But nothing beats the speed of _my_ Flame Runner, and winning's all that matters." It was the only reason he raced - first place - that and the chance to blow the Stupid Brothers (and anybody else in his way) sky high. Peach didn't say anything, put off by his cockiness - and Bowser regretted it, since he realized he'd never heard her talk about the way she handled her bikes.

It made her even more attractive, and Bowser was eager not to end the conversation prematurely. "You're a good racer," he blurted out. _Not as good as me, but... _"But I didn't think you knew...about that stuff."

Peach raised an eyebrow, trying to ignore the fact that she was flattered he thought so. This was _Bowser_. "What stuff? Handling? Drift?" Yes. King Koopa wouldn't be the first person she'd ever met who didn't think she knew one end of a bike from the other. Peach, however, involved herself two-fold in every activity she undertook: both the practical and the theoretical. As a princess, it was expected that she not only be able to perform, but also discuss that which she took an interest in. While such a well-rounded formula was typically related to the arts - such as music, painting, or dance - she saw no reason why it should not also apply to racing. "Why?"

She patiently waited for his response - in the past, Bowser had fantasized about Peach hanging off his every word (as opposed to ignoring him, or screaming, or sobbing so loudly he couldn't hear himself think), but now wasn't one of those times. "Because you're, uh...a princess." And he thought she'd have other things on her mind - like dresses and parties and...crowns.

"So is Daisy," Peach reminded him, ignoring his under-the-breath comment on the matter, "And she can talk your ear off about manual drift on a Dolphin Dasher. She knows a lot more than I do."

Bowser didn't want to hear about what Buttercup-Tulip-whatever-her-name-was (he knew it, but pretended he didn't because she got on his nerves so much) knew. She wasn't his type - if she didn't have a crown, you wouldn't even think she was royalty. _She _belonged with those plumbers a heck of a lot more than Peach did, she even _talked _like them. Not with the dumb accent, but she could sound low-class. Bowser didn't like her, and not just for the 'creative' nicknames she came up with for him. She was loud and belligerent and annoying_. _The Koopa King had long since placed Peach on a pedestal, and not just for her wealth and her beauty; he wanted to protect her, too. She made him feel stronger because he had to be gentle with her.

In theory, anyway. Didn't keep him from _accidentally _knocking her into a moat - but even then, the shove _was _gentle. If it'd been one of the Mario Brothers, Bowser would've smashed him into the side of the castle.

"Good for her." _I don't care. _Did he sound bored enough?

Peach put down her silverware carefully, his impoliteness making it quite easy for her to remember that this was not a social visit. "Bowser." It hadn't escaped her notice that he dodged her questions, so she repeated the most important one, "What do you want?" _Please tell me._

_Not that again. _Bowser stifled a growl, shoving his empty plate away so that he could brace his elbows on the table. Kamek had discouraged him from mentioning "certain ritualistic provisions which might upset a princess of her sensibilities and render her less cooperative". _Whatever_. So Bowser knew he could refuse, scare her into keeping her questions to herself, lock her up if she protested until he needed her - and that was all well and good if he wanted her to hate him forever. He didn't.

"I'll show you," he grudgingly promised, figuring he'd just bring the princess to Kamek and be done with it. "_After _dinner."

That was all the incentive that Peach needed - she promptly pushed her plate aside, as Bowser had done moments before. "I'm finished."

He scowled at her expectant look, glanced at his empty plate, then threw his head back and bellowed, "Well I'm not! Can we get some REFILLS out here!" It was more a command than a question, and Bowser scoffed: she didn't really think one mango burger (and some salad) was enough for _him_, did she?

As frightened Mushroom attendants scurried into the room, he pretended not to notice the disappointed slump in her shoulders. _Bring on the second course._


	9. Pit Stop

**A/N:** Tons and tons of mushrooms and 1Ups and gratitude to **DaLover, dragon19kyoshi, and Ikuni Hattori **for reviews! I promise not to forget the painting - and the 'M' word may or may not have a little something to do with Bowser's nefarious plans. :) Thanks again for reviewing (and reading!) everyone. You're amazing.

**EDIT: **I wanted to add a note about this chapter - I know it occurs after several Bowser/Peach chapters, but I'm trying to keep the timelines even so you can assume all of this is happening simultaneously. I hope it's not too much filler (and that it isn't too confusing) - sorry in advance!

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><p>Peach was definitely missing.<p>

So was the referee, Luigi discovered, and any footage of the race - which was a _real _bummer because Daisy had done this killer trick on the third lap, and she'd wanted to show her father. Mario was worried - he and his brother left to search the rest of the castle, while Daisy insisted that she and Toad could handle the unconscious Koopa Troopa. Oh, she had _big _plans for him - with the Mushroom Retainer's help (and yellow ribbons she'd brought along with her accessories), she tied the suspect's wrists to his Magikruiser handlebars and _pushed _him back onto the track, behind the finish line, near that unsteady patch of land pock-marked with lava-blasting geysers. He was certainly out of harm's way, as was she (and her shorter, jumpier counterpart) but she liked the "privacy". Under the circumstances, it was the closest thing Daisy could get to a suitable environment for interrogation.

"Remember what we talked about?" she prompted under her breath as the Koopa Troopa finally began to stir, blinking his reptilian eyes heavily and tugging as his bindings.

Toad shifted uncertainly where he stood, touching his mushroom cap with one hand. "With all due respect, Your Highness," he replied dubiously, "I'm not sure this is the best course of action."

"Relax, Toad! I've seen this on television, it always works," Daisy replied dismissively, "All you have to do is stand there and look...non-threatening." It shouldn't have been tough_. _He was the good cop, _she _was the bad cop - this meant she'd be doing most of the persuading. A resolute smile crossed her face as the Koopa finally realized he was trapped (she was very good at sailor's knots) and looked up at her. _Show time. _

"Where did Bowser take my cousin, Kooper?"

"I don't know."

Daisy wasn't discouraged, narrowing her eyes triumphantly, "But you admit he _did _take her!"

Kooper frowned, shifting uncomfortably on his bike seat-turned-inquisition chair. "Wha- no? _No_. What is this?"

"_I'm _asking the questions, shellboy!" Daisy snapped, in her mind a perfect mimicry of one of her favorite shows, Sarasaland 5-0. It was _so good_. "Do you know how many treaties Bowser has broken today?" She didn't give him the chance to guess, "Do you know how many _you've _broken as an accomplice? Why, I have enough evidence to imprison you right now!"

"U-u-um," Toad stuttered nervously, unprepared for Daisy's sideways (and emphatic) glance, "H-however, if you...um...if you help us, we'll b-be sure to inf-form the racing commission that you c-cooperated. I-if-" he cast a pleading look the princess' way, because he didn't believe he could do this.

_Good enough_, thought Daisy charitably, cutting off Toad's painful performance with a much more intimidating, "If you _don't_, you'll never race again!" Now. "Where is my cousin?"

"I don't know."

"Listen, we already _know _he took her," she insisted impatiently, "You don't have to look at the instant replay to figure that out!" The Koopa Troopa said nothing. "I mean, Bowser's missing, Peach is missing, and _you_ don't look worried - if your king was _really _in trouble, you wouldn't be so calm, Kooper." It was more than just his 'good' timing after the race, his entire behavior was questionable. Just as soon as someone tracked down the Lakitu, they'd have video footage to confirm what Daisy already knew. Why wouldn't he just do himself a favor and speak up now?

Daisy tried every tactic she knew of to get a confession - she even pushed Toad back into the limelight, where he stumbled through more lines - but the Koopa Troopa wouldn't change his story. He continued to insist that he didn't know where Bowser and Peach were, or what had happened, or how it happened. The fact that she _knew _he was lying made it all the more frustrating! If only she had the video feed - then he couldn't deny anything!

"If you're so _innocent_," Daisy demanded, pacing back and forth in front of her captive, "then why did you try to attack us?" Revving up one's bike to _run over _two people wasn't an accident. She'd seen the intent in Kooper's face before she'd dodged a would-be collision.

"I didn't try to attack _you_, Your Highness," he defended, unapologetic, "But Mario was armed."

Daisy scoffed, because while she could reluctantly admit it wasn't an _unbelievable _answer, she knew it was the right one. "Admit it, you knew you'd been caught," she argued, "You were just trying to escape our custody!"

"No, ma'am."

"_Don't_ call me ma'am!" _Just tell me where she is. _"Look_, _Kooper, just-" Toad wasn't fit to play her counterpart, so Daisy was stuck with both roles, and while her voice wasn't gentle, she tried for a less overtly forceful approach. In fact, she leaned down so that she could look at him in the face when she asked, "Is she still in the castle?"

He didn't look away, as guilty parties sometimes do. "I don't know."

_You're lying. _So much for 'less forceful'. "Just answer the question!" she shouted, "Is she in the castle or not? Yes or no?"

"Your Highness-" Toad prodded her with a hand on her shoulder, but before Daisy glanced up, she heard an answer.

"No." _Luigi_. The Koopa Troopa didn't say anything, but it didn't matter. The princess released an anxious breath she didn't even know she'd been holding - and she tucked a stray curl of auburn hair behind her ear as the green-capped hero pulled up next to her. Mario, too. "She's-a not here, Daisy."

"How do you know?" she asked, ignoring the way her heart seemed to stutter - even worse than Toad - when Luigi looked at her.

"We found-a something." Daisy's mood lifted - hopefulness - because at first, they'd seemed so empty-handed. Instead of an explanation, Mario drew the glove from his pocket. Her eyes widened. She knew that shade of pink, and immediately snatched it from him, holding it up comparatively with her own. It was the exact same style.

"This is Peachy's!" There was no doubt about it, "Where'd you find it? Did you find anything else?"

"We searched the towers. There was-a nothing else up-a there." And, Luigi added, it was the only clue they'd found. Her glove. At the top of a tower.

"Do you think she left it on purpose?" Mario shrugged - it was a possibility and Daisy thought, well, it had to be more than a mere _possibility_. Peach wouldn't just go around with a missing glove for no reason. Now how many ways were there to get off a tower? "You think Bowser brought that stupid bowling ball he calls a car?" Which was already ridiculous in and of itself, because it wasn't a car at all. At least he got the _clown _part right. The copter _was _small, from what she'd seen (and heard from Peach). It was also quiet. And things had been very chaotic after the race...

He took her to another castle. It was the conclusion Mario and Luigi had reached - the most obvious one. _Aha_.

Poor Peach. Daisy realized that her suspect had overheard the entire conversation - but actually, this worked in her favor. She turned back to him, brandishing her cousin's glove in his face, ink stains and all. "_What_," she challenged, "do you have to say about that?" Proof.

"I'm no Goomba."

"What?"

"I'm no Goomba," Kooper repeated firmly, proudly, the most honest thing he'd said during this catastrophe of a Q&A. "I am a soldier of His Majesty's Koopa Troop. I won't commit treason against my King." And Her Highness was an amateur interrogator. He'd been trained to withstand much more than that - and whatever 'amnesty' she thought she could offer meant nothing. King Bowser wasn't merciful to traitors, and Kooper wasn't about to sign his own death sentence.

_He knows_, Daisy realized. She'd suspected, but now she was positive. _He knows exactly where she is, but he's not telling. _She was so angry. "Why you-"

"Daisy!" Luigi's quick reflexes caught her wrist before she did anything foolish. The Princess of Sarasaland striking a soldier of the Dark Lands _in the Dark Lands__? _It wouldn't look good. He pulled her away from the smug Koopa Troopa before she lost her temper, trying to lighten the mood with a whispered, "You've got-a admire the dedication."

"No! No, I really _don't!"_ Dedication, shmedication, Kooper hadn't endeared himself to her _at all - _and she _whacked _Luigi in the side of the head, hard, twisting out of his grasp, "That scaly creep took Peach - right under our noses! It is not okay!"

"Mamma mia! Daisy- _yowch!_" She even stomped on his foot, lashing out at him as the nearest person. "We'll-a find her, bella, don't-a worry!" Luigi took her by the shoulders, crushed toes or not, and held her tightly - until she stopped fighting so hard. "Daisy, _guardarmi_. We'll-a find her," he repeated.

She scowled, but she didn't hit him again and that was an...improvement. "Fine," she said shortly, "But _he's_-" and with that, she pointed directly at Kooper, "-not going anywhere!" She didn't want to give him a chance to warn Bowser. The brothers agreed, and readily too, but it wasn't enough to cool her temper. "Where's Toadsworth? I need to talk to him." Toad piped up that he could take her to her cousin's steward - and Daisy left the Koopa Troopa in the capable hands of Luigi and his brother.

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><p>Daisy deliberately sought out the very stuffy Toadsworth just to fill him in on what'd been learned - <em>that <em>was dedication. But things got complicated once news of the kidnapping reached the series coordinators; having never had a precedence for this kind of thing, everyone struggled to guess what it meant for the logistics and peace agreements of the Special Cup. Tensions rapidly heightened with the local koopa population - especially once the missing referee was discovered, unconscious and tucked away in one of the castle's many dungeons. Where was the impostor? The video footage was still missing - and great protests were raised when it was announced that the entire Cup would be suspended until a full-scale investigation turned up both Princess Peach and King Bowser. Great and noble heroes that they were, Mario and Luigi were requested (by the Mushroom Kingdom) to recover their princess.

Not only was Daisy determined _not _to be left out, but she wanted to get started as soon as possible - and as _quickly _as possible. She thought that, for Bowser to do what he did, in the middle of a _race_, he had to be planning something horrible. It would take too long for Mario and Luigi to search all of Bowser's castles - sure, they might get lucky in the first one, but Peachy might've been trapped in the _eighth _one. Or the tenth. There was no way to know how many he really had.

So she had a plan.

"I'm sure you all know," she started, "by now that Bowser and Peach are missing. It's pretty likely that he's kid-"

"So what?"

"So..._I'm getting to that_," Daisy snapped with an imperious glare at Waluigi, "As I was _saying_, he's kidnapped her. We-" she exchanged a meaningful look with Mario and Luigi who, alongside Toad, stood to the side. "-believe it's something very serious, um, this time-" as opposed to the dozen times Bowser had done the very same thing in the past, "-and we need your help-"

"Wahahahahaha!"  
>Even Wario chimed in with Waluigi's guffawing, interrupting the princess yet again - and the two of them formed a great, discordant chorus that infuriated Daisy to no end.<p>

"Not on your life, Princess!"  
>"There's-a nothing in it for us." But charity work - and Wario'd sooner drown in coins than <em>spit <em>in the direction of helping someone for free. Especially if that someone was _Mario_.

"Wanna bet, dipsticks?" Daisy stepped forward aggressively, "The races are postponed until she's found, you _geniuses_, and if we don't get her back by the end of the week, it'll all be canceled." Everything related to the Cup - including the parade and the awards ceremony. Mushroom Kingdom could hardly be expected to host the celebrations with its princess held hostage in some Stars-forsaken firepit somewhere. "That means no trophies, no prize money, no endorsements, no festival, _nothing, nada, zilch_. They won't even televise it."

Wario cursed.

So _there_. Did those losers really want all their work and bravado to go to waste for another year? Didn't they want the fame, the bejeweled trophies, the free food and (misplaced) admiration of the crowds? It made Daisy absolutely ill that she had to consider _bribing _people she didn't even want around - but honestly, the sooner they found Bowser and Peachy, the better. The longer their absence, the bigger the diplomatic mess.

"Even if you don't care about Princess Toadstool - or Bowser, for that matter," who would possibly care about him except for that all-too-stubborn Koopa Troopa? "And even if you don't care about the future of this series or what it means for all of us," Diddy Kong, Yoshi, even King Boo (who had, for some reason, completely vanished from the proceedings), brought together in one of the most successful international sports competitions in the world, "You-"

"You mean we all lose?" Waluigi, who couldn't seem to let Daisy _finish a sentence _without interrupting, seemed genuinely irritated. "Just because Bowser can't keep it in his shell?"

"Hey! Watch-a your mouth!"  
>"You're disgusting!" <em>And Peachy is not that kind of girl. <em>Ugh. Who would- _ugh_. No. No. _No_.

"What? You got something to say, Greenbean?"

"_No_, he doesn't!" Daisy interrupted loudly, "Can it, Waluigi!" This was exactly what she _didn't _want to happen. At least with Mario and Luigi, she knew that they wouldn't bicker like _children _- but that couldn't be said for the lanky nuisance in front of her (or his overweight buddy). "We have to work _together_. The racing commission is sending representatives to the castles Bowser permitted for use in the Leaf and Lightning Cups, so we're going to hit the other ones." She really didn't like the way Waluigi turned his nose down when he looked at her - and so she broke eye contact quickly, stepping away from him to search the expressions of the two racers who weren't quite as chatty.

"Are you in?" she asked them, individually. "We really need to find Pe-Princess Toadstool." It was weird for her, using her cousin's proper title - but she thought it would be more recognizable and...she wanted to sound official.

"Yoshi!"

"Um." Did anybody here speak Yoshi? Daisy had never been as adept at languages as Peach, but she had plenty of other skills. "Sorry, is that a yes?"

"Yo-yo!"

O-kay then. Daisy gave a cautious smile, and when the Yoshi just stared at her with very intelligent eyes, she figured that...yes, that had to be a _yes_. Diddy Kong was much the same way - she had no idea what he said, but he seemed pretty enthusiastic. She wondered if he had Donkey Kong's permission or not...did he need Donkey Kong's permission? She would've told him that his...uncle...or friend or...whatever their relation was (she wasn't sure) was welcome too, if it weren't for the fact that Luigi had told her that Donkey Kong wasn't on very good terms with Mario. Since she already had her hands full with Waluigi and Wario...

"You gonna ask us if we're on board, Daisy?" Case in point? Hands. Full.

She could just _feel _him behind her, and knew that if she didn't deal with him - Luigi would. So Daisy turned to regard him with the utmost disdain, "I already know you are. Your brother _really _wants his prizes." And not for the first place recognition, or the prestige of the victory, but because placing in the Special Cup meant an impressive amount of coinage - and the trophy could be melted down for quite a hefty profit.

Waluigi wasn't in it for the coins - which was why he felt so comfortable towering over the princess with his hands in his pockets. "Wario won't work with Mario. And I'll only work with you." Then, seeing the protest in her eyes, he quickly added, "You say no, you kiss our help good-bye and hope Bowser doesn't flamebroil your cousin this time around." If it weren't for this nagging feeling in her stomach that she needed to find Peach, sooner rather than later, Daisy would've thrown her hands up. She didn't like to feel boxed in - and she didn't trust Waluigi as far as she could kick him. But in the end, they needed the extra help.

The racers split into two groups, so as to cover more ground - while protecting one another from whatever traps Bowser might have laid. Much to Luigi's dismay, he ended up yet again on the opposite team of people he cared about most. Daisy, Mario, Waluigi (at his insistence) and Yoshi would go to one castle, while Luigi, Toad, Wario, and Diddy Kong would go to the second. Daisy knew it wasn't fair to her green man - but the four of them had mutually decided they couldn't trust Waluigi and Wario together. Yoshi and Diddy Kong were more trustworthy (if not particularly talkative), and Daisy would have been willing to work with them, but neither Mario nor Luigi was comfortable leaving _her _alone in the company of Waluigi. Frankly, Daisy wasn't really comfortable with it either - she would probably end up pushing him in a pit of lava, and then she'd be down one team member.

Toad wasn't the...best fighter, but he earnestly wanted to help, and no one had the heart to tell him to stay behind. Daisy was surprised he even offered to come along - and she didn't want to belittle the bravery. Kooper wasn't an option, since he was the _least _trustworthy of them all, and King Boo was nowhere to be found.

Their search groups weren't ideal, Daisy knew that, and Toadsworth had most emphatically tried to dissuade her from her course of action. Her father would be furious. But this was something she just had to do. They would investigate separate castles - and meet two days from now. Two days, and she would see Luigi again. She hoped, by then, they'd have good news for one another.

__Hold on, Peachy. We'll find you.__


	10. The Instruction Manual

**A/N:** I rewrote this chapter about four times, and I'm still not completely happy with it but I wanted to go ahead and post it. Annnd I also wanted to thank my awesome reviewers: **Ikuni Hattori, DaLover **(you were so right about the guard/cop distinction; I've edited it to reflect that!)**, dragon19kyoshi, **and **Tally. **I totally appreciate the time you take, it's really awesome. :)

That being said, I own nothing. As usual. Nintendo rules.

Also, if you guys are Bowser fans, I recommend you google '5 Reasons Bowser is the Most Successful Video Game Character' because I recently found that article and it was HILARIOUS. Also, very true. Go Bowser!

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><p>She watched Bowser eat five servings. Five! At first, she'd thought he only ate to deliberately lengthen their dinner - but soon it became quite obvious that he was <em>hungry<em>. Peach had never seen someone devour so much in such a short amount of time - but she'd never eaten in the company of someone his size, either. She asked him what he intended to show her, and as he wiped his claws on the tablecloth (ooh, it was _lace__!_), he told her they were in the library. Who? Peach wasn't foolish - well, she liked to think she wasn't - and she knew she couldn't possibly have met all of Bowser's forces occupying her castle. But to see them pulling apart her father's library before her very eyes? It left her with an overpowering sense of intrusiveness.

Both she and Bowser stood in the threshold - and Peach caught her breath as she not only saw teetering columns of books stacked on mahogany tables, on the staircase, on the floor, but two magikoopas hovering in mid-air, pulling down texts from the highest shelves of her bookcases, flicking through the pages with practiced ease.

"Oh my Stars."

"Ah, Princess!" The third bespectacled magikoopa peered out from behind a mound of anthologies on the library floor - and although thick blue robes didn't distinguish him from his companions in the air, the white sleeves and brim of his hat did. "It is a pleasure to see you again - and in the company of His Majesty."

She wished that she could say the same. "Hello, Kamek."

"Yeah, yeah, big reunions, yadda yadda," Bowser interrupted, "Tell her why we're here."

"Of course, Sire." The magikoopa was utterly unperturbed by his king's rudeness - but Peach imagined he must've been used to it after so many years. "Please, Your Highness," he indicated a chair at one of the tables with the tip of his scepter, the books shifting themselves aside by use of magic.

Peach summoned a tremulous smile as she took a seat, acutely aware that she was allowing herself to be directed in her own library. Kamek seemed so very familiar with this room, she wondered how long he had been here, pouring over her kingdom's most valuable archives. _What a mess_.

Following her gaze with his own, Kamek accurately guessed the source of her anxiety. "I assure you, Your Highness," he ventured, "All will be restored to its rightful place. I've been keeping a very precise inventory."

"I see." The princess wasn't in a position to demand anything - she could only trust (trust?) that the magikoopa would keep his word.

"Your library is extraordinary," he added respectfully, "It contains extensive magical and historical resources that complement those we have in the Dark Lands." Kamek was quite careful in his choice of words, knowing that if he implied in any way that His Majesty's library was...lacking, he would overcompensate. Belligerently.

"Yeah," Bowser cut in, realizing that as boring as he found this stuff, he _still _wanted Peach's attention on him. "Too bad it doesn't do you any good."

"I beg your pardon?"

As defensiveness faintly echoed in her tone, Kamek sighed. "Right you are, My Lord," he admitted, but with a certain measure of finesse, amended, "We would not expect Her Highness to have an innate aptitude for koopa magic. However," he acknowledged the princess, "You are in possession of texts that may aid us in interpreting a difficult spell."

"Oh." Peach remembered the first time Bowser had abducted her - to prevent her from reversing his transfiguration of her people. While her natural power remained largely untapped, she did have an elementary knowledge of magic. And following her safe return (the first of many), the castle's library expanded upon its volumes of koopa mythos - in hopes of preventing a second attack of such magnitude.

Before Kamek could elaborate, Bowser spoke - from behind her, which she didn't appreciate for it reminded her of those long hours where he guarded her himself, "Kamek's been chief adviser to my dad and me," surprising Peach with such an off-hand mention of his father. It had never occurred to her that someone such as him would have _parents. _"Before him, we had Kamul."

"Yes," agreed the magikoopa, nodding in acquiescence to his king, "My predecessor was renowned for his foresight." Though apparently not into his own fate - for he was flayed alive over a lake of lava as a traitor before His Majesty had been hatched. It was better left unsaid. "And his great aptitude for spellcraft-"

"The spell is _mine_," Bowser added arrogantly, "But I can't use it until these idiots figure out what's missing." He glowered at the magikoopas above them, who paid their respects but continued to work feverishly. They did not acknowledge the princess at all.

She wished that Bowser would extend her that courtesy. _Must he interrupt every other word?_ "Can you not guess?" What is 'missing'? As one might with a recipe.

"Unfortunately not, Your Highness," Kamek replied, this time before Bowser had the opportunity to interrupt, "Kamul safeguarded his most potent spells through...a sort of runic gibberish, a cipher. While we've successfully linked the cipher with its key, there are still elements that are uniquely Kamul's - they will be difficult to replicate, even for one as skilled in the arts as myself." Kamek spoke without any conceit; it was simply a fact that he was an extraordinarily powerful magikoopa. "We have exhausted our resources." _And so have come for yours._

Peach could not imagine her library yielding what the magikoopas sought: there was no dark magic here. What incantations were stored in her shelves would be those of protection and defense.

"Forgive me, what is this spell for?" she asked uneasily - not at all comforted by the manner in which Bowser towered over her, so close that their shadows merged on the tabletop.

The princess really couldn't stand it, to have her silhouette swallowed up by his. It made her feel- "Power," he said, and as a great proponent of prophecies that guaranteed his absolute domination over everything he set his sights on, it was with supreme confidence that the Koopa King informed her, "No one will stand against me." This was what he'd been told by Kamek - and he liked the sound of it so much that he took the words for himself. The Mario Brothers didn't stand a chance with their high jumps and their stupid mustaches; he would destroy them in the time it took his princess to blink.

"I- excuse me."

"Peach-" She stood suddenly and Bowser, without thinking, extended a claw to her which she made every effort to avoid as she darted out of the library. He followed her to the doorway, reaching it in time to see her dress as she turned down a corner- "I didn't even _threaten _her!" Hell, he didn't mention those stupid plumbers either, or Mushrooms, or...

"Perhaps she is merely overwhelmed, Sire." Kamek was unsurprised, and watched the princess leave with a calculating gaze. "For now."

"I'm gonna talk to her."

_Tread carefully, Your Majesty_. "Very well."

The princess steadied herself against the wall, pressing her hands to her face. The smell of satin only seemed to encourage her eyes to sting and she took a very deep, unsteady breath. _You mustn't cry. What if someone sees you? _She could not frighten her servants by showing them just how thoroughly the Koopa King scared her.

"Peach!" She dropped her hands to her sides as soon as Bowser saw her - and she thought she saw relief in his face. Why? Because she didn't run from him? Where would she go? "Peach, hey." _You already said her name, she knows her name. _

"Why am I here?" she asked softly, "If you only wanted the _spell_, you_-" _He could've found it before she ever received word that the castle had been breached. This was not to say that Peach wished harm on her people, or that she would've willingly left them here among the Koopa Troop, she just- she didn't understand.

"I don't only want the spell!" Were he more of a moron, he might've allowed himself to think she was jealous - oh, he wished. Anything would be better than disdain.

"Why am I here?" she repeated. He never answered her questions.

"I want _you_." Or when he did, he said things she wished he hadn't. Peach refused to look at him, and Bowser hastily explained, "I want..." _to marry you_, "...you to see what I'm gonna be." He braced his hands against the wall, several feet above her head, claws digging into stone. "Look at me."

Peach tilted her chin up obediently, uncomfortably, but found it so difficult to hold his gaze. "What will you do once you complete the spell? Will you hurt us? Is that why you've brought your soldiers?"

Bowser scowled down at her, disbelievingly. Where did she get an idea like that? "No. _No_. I would never hurt you, Peach." Not purposefully.

If she believed him, she didn't let it show. "And my people? What will you do to them? My castle?" She closed her eyes slowly, lingeringly, in an effort to withhold the tears. Power, he said. Even as he was, Bowser had more than proven that her kingdom was no match for him. "Must you destroy _everything_?" It had slipped out, unintended, but to hear the question echo in her voice, the air, she started to cry.

Bowser swore, a string of profanities that would've blistered the fair princess' ears had he spoken them aloud. He hated it when she cried - typically, it just made him angry 'cause it was a sure sign that his...courting methods were ineffective. But tonight, he wished he could have told her the truth - she wouldn't get it, and she'd be mad, but she'd come around. Eventually. Probably. He figured that the only reason she wasn't happy with him was 'cause she hadn't been _with _him long enough - and that damn plumber was always crashing in, ruining the mood, what a pain. Tonight, it was all on him_. _

_I don't wanna destroy, I wanna rule. _He only destroyed when things didn't go his way - which was pretty often with Mario around, but he didn't figure Peach would make that distinction. She thought that moron could do no wrong. "Princess," he slid a clawed hand down the wall with a quiet, even scrape, then skimmed scaly knuckles, the back of his hand, against the line of her jaw.

He was so careful that the muscles in his arm and wrist nearly shook - she really had no idea how much he restrained himself with her. She was, evidently, too upset to shove him away - and he gritted his teeth with the promise, "Once I get what I want," the spell, that is, "I'll leave your kingdom out of it." _It won't be yours anymore. __It'll be ours. Mine. _Was he splitting scales? Probably. He didn't want to lie to her, but he couldn't tell her the truth either. And he wanted her to stay right where she was, permissive of his touch.

What he said, it got her to look at him. That was the best part. "Your word?" she asked, having no better way to insure his honesty. She wanted to believe him so much.

_That_ made him uncomfortable. "Yeah," he forced it out, "What I say goes. Believe _that_." And? "Stop crying." He practically pleaded it.

"I'm not crying."

"Uh huh."

Embarrassed, Peach wiped the evidence away with her fingers, first one cheek, then the- her hand bumped into his, and she flushed at the impropriety. "Bowser." He reluctantly withdrew, even shuffled a step back. "Thank you." She knew that she couldn't help him find this spell - and that, if possible, she ought to discover its counterspell. Its weaknesses, so that the Koopa King might be defeated. If Bowser were any more powerful, he would be a grave danger to the free kingdoms bordering the Dark Lands (and those far beyond). But he had promised the safety of her kingdom - and there were no people she felt more responsible for than her own. Now she felt that she could direct all her efforts towards aiding Mario.

"Yeah." _That's it? __Smooth - as a spiked koopa shell_.

Peach uncertainly dropped her gaze to her dress, smoothing out the bodice. "I should retire." She gave a very small smile. "I'm very tired."

_Say something. _"Do you, uh, need me to walk you-"

"No," she interrupted quickly, but gently so as not to offend him, "Thank you. I believe I know the way." Bowser allowed her to leave, and it was with such relief that Peach slipped into her bedroom, she did not even change out of her dinner gown before she fell asleep.


	11. Author's Note

Hi guys. I'm actually wrapping up the real Chapter 11, but I wanted to post this first - mostly in response to Athriz (because I think you make valid points and it did cause me to pause and rethink). Also, in general - if those of you reading are disappointed in what you have so far.

I would like to just throw out that** Super Paper Mario** isn't included in my game canon (in terms of past incidents) - because I think they definitely get along in that game a lot more than I'm portraying them here (I actually love SPM, but as I was writing this, I realized it wouldn't work to have that background). I probably should've said this in the first chapter - but ah, well, I'll add that in to the author's note later. Sorry, lol.

I completely agree that Peach doesn't seem to harbor much resentment against Bowser, period (she's a very forgiving person) and I know resentment has been a major theme of her perspective in this story so far. I think part of my reason for doing that is to distinguish, 'hey, I'm perfectly fine with you kidnapping every other day of the week because you've been doing that for years' from his snatching her in the middle of a Mario Kart race. I feel like she probably lives her day to day life half-expecting to be kidnapped - except when she's racing, because he usually behaves.

Part of the reason she isn't feeling much sympathy for him right now (from my perspective, at least) is because there hasn't a been a situation yet where he's in danger, or he's been self-sacrificing, or he's done something to remind her that he's not an awful person (I mean, the one time he 'saved' her on the race track, it was a big setup so...).

That being said, if you're not really enjoying the hostility between them right now (one-sided, I guess), I would ask you to please try to stick it out. Not only am I bringing the koopalings in (who I think humanize Bowser a lot), but I am also bringing additional problems - hurray! - that will showcase his more heroic tendencies. There WILL be fluff, it's just slow-going (because I take awhile in evolving this kind of stuff), but I promise that once we get there, it will be worth it (I hope).

And this is me, totally trying to bribe you.

Anyway, that's all I had to say. I really did want to mention the SPN stuff earlier, but I just kept forgetting.  
>Thanks in advance for your understanding and all of your comments. I really do appreciate it, I think it makes me a better, more cognizant writer!<p>

Chapter 11 (the real chapter) will be up very very soon!


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